General Chat

Is this a silly question?

If it's someone I've not seen for a while I tend to ask how they are and want to catch up a bit with their news etc.

But, I've noticed that a lot of people that I see on a regular basis say it ... And generally, I say "fine - how are you?" and they say "fine" But really, I'm struggling with this, that or the other and so are they so we're not fine, not really. But we don't tell each other that - and I wonder what the point of the question is ...

(maybe this is just me?)

Jill

I always say "I'm fine, how are you? " lol. But when it's to my good friend and brother they both say the same and then we laugh and say " now how are you really?"

** chews fruit platter thoughtfully **



Thank you for asking seems no body else has bothered too, I am truamatised h'actually....how are you? Yes enough about you..... back to me as I was saying...

LOL Rose - that's it - so why do we ask it?

Hayley - get back in yer box! (How are you my lovely?)

Jill

Carol as you well know I hate to talk about myself ....but how are you dear? shut up Mrs G I am talking now :)

So Carol - why do we ask it? If we don't have time say, then surely "hello - hope you're OK" is better than asking a question that the other person can't really, truthfully answer. Isn't it?

Jill

p.s. Hayley - behave!

I think the natural tendency of people is to say how are you, we don;t expect them to say well my dig died a horrible death and my fatgherhas *** my mother did this and I have ****

Same as we answer we are fine because we know they don't expect to hear all the problems.

If you are asking about somebody you haven't seen for awhile it must be harder for them to say my life is shit.
Plus there is pride ...who will always say that life is fine no matter what hurts are about.

I like to be truthful....so when people say "hi Hayley havent seen you for ages gosh your looking well have you lost weight " I tend to reply " Yeah I avoid you most of the time thats why"...but thats only if I have... *glares at Mrs G ...you will keep * :)

I say 'fine' usually. Good friends usually greet me with" you look like crud" or "nice spot on your nose", then you don't have to bother saying "fine".

Sue x

**mutters ** what about the ones to scared of you to speak :)))))

There aren't any woman, why should anyone be scared?

lololol

** to scared to answer **

If someone was ask me that, yea i'd tell them i was fine, cos if i was to tell them about the crap thats going on at the moment they would probably jump off a bridge

So Uzzi, it would be easier not to ask the question then? But maybe it's a habit we've got into ...

I am glad though that it's not just me who notices this. I was beginning to think I'm a bit odd (don't answer that Hayley!)

Jill

**applies gag**

lol

Spoke with aged BIL tonight, I always tell him I'm fine so he doesn't worry. Do the same with the kids most of the time too.

I expect we all say it to some extent because we are protecting the person who is asking or we really can't be bothered to form a reasonable reply :-))

Sue x

or as Julie has said you think why depress them. as well.....

I say fine when I am not.
It was once said that it stands for fouled up, insecure, neurotic and emotional.


Otherwise, I say something like I am well, thank you. And how is life with you.


Other times, other phrases come to mind. And sometimes I tell the truth about how I am :-)

Wouldn't it be funny if people still used the expression " How do you do ? "
which I guess is pretty much the same as our "modern " traditional greeting of " How are you ? ".

It is a bit of a silly question though given the fact that most of us immediately lie as say " fine" ..........lol

It's the nice thing about email as compared to the phone -- you don't have to start out every conversation with "hello, how are you?" "I'm fine, how are you?" ;)