General Chat

Colin, I don't know what to say to make things better, I wish I did

But for you (((((((((HUGS))))))))) bigtime

Hi Teresa :)

There is so much strength to be found in those hugs and very much appreciated Thank You :)

hi colin, firstly im very sorry your going through this and your parents, belive me if your sister wanted to get off the stuff she would do it alone or with support, i knew someone once who really wanted to stop and she did of her own back, untill she says i am ready and mean it nothing can be done and its time to draw the line, if she wants you all so much she will stop, tell your parents its called tough love and only she can do it, but why should she when she can still con people fpr money, she is a adult and has chose her path in life , so you carry on with yours, if she becomes clean she will understand , i promise love puss xxxx, pm me if you want xx

hi colin,,

very very lucky in that i havnt faced any of other peoples addictions in my own family,,but when you concede to aid them to feed their addiction you become part of that addiction aswell,,drawing you in into their seedy world of lies &decite,and emotional blackmail.

There comes a time when those the closest has to take a back stand and let go,as nothing you do will compare to a -craving-only if you help feed it,,,,,,,,,,

Hope things get better all round in 2008.........

Hi Puss, Hi Kay :)

Thank You for your messages

There is so much in both of your messages that I feel myself at this time, You are right the only help available comes from sister helping herself and really wanting to break away from the addiction.

Those lies, decite and blackmail is something I have become very accustomed to.

Giving in to her is definitely not the way to deal with things

Thanks for your pm offer Puss, its most appreciated :)

Colin :):)

sorry to hear about your sister Colin, I know what you and your family are going through my son is a drug user we put up with it for 20 years in and out of prison stealing money and possesions from family, the last straw was when he started to threaten myself and his two sisters and their families. I had to move away and sell the home that I had lived in for 27 years we lost a lot of money on it but but peace of mind was worth it. I have not seen or spoken to my son for 5 years it was very hard at first and i had a breakdown, now I am very happy and I know my daughters are safe , he is 40 years old and is still taking drugs and I think he is selling them also, your parents will find it very hard to cut their daughter off, but if she realy wants to come off the drugs this might make her re think what she is doing to herself and her family. Unfortunatly this did not work with my son. Best of luck
Love Jackie

Dear Colin, I have just sat and read through the entire thread. There is some very good advice but first of all I want to give you a big hug.......


I hope and pray things will improve, that somehow the right help will reach your sister.But you do need to step back, for yourself and your families sake.

Please PM me if you need to. I have a family situation which is slowly pulling my family apart and know how it feels when Christmas is miserable,


With love,


Caz xxxx

Hi Jackie & Thank You.

Sorry to hear that you yourself have been going through this.
You have certainly been through enough of it to know the full extent of what is happening at the moment. That violence escalates pretty fast to and so protection becomes a must. I am so sorry you lost so much because of it. As a parent it is so much harder to let go. I see that pain in my Mums face. Sending you (((((((( Big Hugs ))))))))) today.


Hi Coal Miners Daughter. & Thank You

Your message is one that also hits at my heart. I was brought up with Christian beliefs, to help everyone and to forgive everyone also. Its not in my nature to fully give up. Both my Mum, Dad and my sister mean a lot to me so I have to weigh all the options open to me. I have spoken with Mum today and we fully respect each others decisions in how we handle this. One thing I could never do is leave Mum and Dad to this alone. Sectioning is somthing that has been forced before and something I shall defininately try to get accross to them again. Drugs is an evil to think about and I do understand that it is the drugged state we are dealing with rather then sister herself. Paths to follow are not mine or parents choices to make as they can only lead the way, all I can hope that sister finds that path before it is to late.


Hi Caz : & Thank You

Families, what can we do with them sometimes eh ?. Life experience gained, although sometimes the hard way :) If I can help you in anyway, then Im always here somewhere also. (((((( Big Hugs)))))) back to you

Best Wishes

Colin

Hi Jude :) Sorry I did it again didnt I, you snuck in there when I was typing again sorry :)

Thank You for adding yours today :)

No I definately dont think you are having a go at me, bless You :):) Your Lovely :), you are talking perfect sense.

Colin :):)

Tough love Colin - unless she wants to help herself and it does not sound like it - your sister will not change and she is emotionally blackmailing each and everyone. It is not right and is not fair that we should have our lives made such a misery and hell by those around us who are using us - do not care about us - they want their next fix, drink, bet - they would sell their mother/gran/sister for it.

There comes a time in one's life when you have to say 'enough is enough'. 'You want help - then begin to help yourself - I have had enough' and stick to it. Do not feel guilty - that is what they will play on.

Take care everyone in a similar situation.