General Chat

Who thinks you should thank people for their gifts? My mother took my nieces and nephew`s presents to their houses . I asked her tonight if she had forgotten , no, . I said well that`s funny -not one of them has phoned to say they have got them -over £100 spent on them in total. What did you give them she asked -SLANKETS for big nieces -yes they tried them on on Xmas Day, cookery book for niece -oh yes she phoned and told her about it but not thanked me. Mad is an understatement!!!
Ros xx

IT'S ONLY MANNERS TO THANK PEOPLE.

MY KIDS WERE ALWAYS MADE TO PHONE OR WRITE TO THANK THE PERSON, AND MY DAUGHTER MAKES THE BOYS DO THE SAME.

THEY EVEN SAY 'THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME NANNY' WHEN THEY LEAVE TO GO HOME.

MANNERS MAKETH THE MAN!!

It's funny - I sort of don't expect it these days. Only when I post presents - like to my nephew's children - and even then I don't expect a thank you, just an acknowledgement that they've arrived safely.

Odd really. When I was a child we were "encouraged" to sit down and write our thank you letters ....

Jill

JILL , I`m the same -wrote letters on Boxing Day with notelets I got for Xmas

I didn't get any gifts as a child from any one but my parents, and a plastic purse from my grandparents with chocolate money in it. So said thank you to them, there and then. So I didn't learn the lesson to write a letter. But I picked it up. and asked my kids to write a letter of thanks to people. My daughter is 26 and still writes, but it is harder to get my son (23)to do the same.

I used to get my son to write or phone thank yous for birthday and Christmas presents etc unless the person had handed it to him and he had opened it in front of them in which case he would have said thank you then, and they would have seen his delight, or dismay lol

I stopped bothering with my nephew as he never said thank you and to be honest, once he got out to work, he was probably better off than me! We have never been close, as my s.i.l. and brother haven't encouraged it, they didn't encourage him to be close with my parents even.

I do find it harder to get my son to do anything these days, which saddens me, he has stopped bothering to send his Nanna in Malta cards and I don't suppose he sent one to his father there either, don't know if he got a card or present this year, there was one sent last year because we had not long been back from a visit so he was fresh in their minds! As he doesn't live with me, it is difficult to get him to do these things, altho he knows it would be a bad move if he ever forgot or didn't bother to get me a card for whatever occasion.

Haven't even had a card from my youngest brother this year - suppose I better call and see if he is ok, but they don't make a lot of effort.

I didn't send a gift to my son's ex's little boy this year either as I put a lot of effort into making him a photo album of pics taken when he spent time with me etc and enclosed some money last year, and not a call, letter, nothing so didn't bother this year. He has so much anyway as both sets of grandparents divorced and so 4 lots of gifts there to start with, all taken for granted.

I think it is very sad tho, but I suppose the more people who don't expect it the less the thank yous will happen. Standards of politeness have slipped so far down I think they will never be the norm again, what a shame!
LIzx

one of my pet hates - people who don't thank! I've already bought Thank You notes for both kids. They will write a few every day until they are done. Jamie also has to write birthday ones to give to his mates at school the day they go back. However, I have never been thanked by any child or parent for a gift we've given (after they've opened it, they say thanks as you hand it over) which I find shocking. I tell my kids that if they can't be bothered to thank people, then those same folks won't be bothered to send a gift next year. From what you others have written here, I'm not lying!
Maz. XX

I have always done thank yous - even when boys were small -i did ones on the computer with pictures. Some people do say it's the only thank you they get !!

Oh I had a Slanket for Christmas too, lovely.

But to your question, I always write thank you letters to those people who have given me gifts.

Tina xx

My oldest grandsons always e mail a thank you which in this modern age I find acceptable. (16, 19 and 20). Youngest two always phone and thank us, then follow up later with a thank you letter (6 and 12). Sister and I thank each other via e mails these days, neighbours son (15) always writes a note). Daughter and son phone and thank us.

but to answer your question it is bad manners not to thank people, but i don't expect it immediately, probably within two weeks.

We stopped sending to my niece and gt nieces because we never knew if they had received the (posted) gifts. as they live in flats in London there was always a doubt. They had usually got the stuff, just didn't bother to say anything so now they just get cards.

I always had to do them and dreaded doing it as never knew what to write, my sister used to do the letters beforehand and then just fill in bits of what she got.
Mine always do them a lot of the time under protest but i tell them if they cant thank people i will take the gifts away. Tiddler and Laddo already done theirs just eldest to go but the nagging will start today so I can get them all posted.
Mine dont have a lot to write my parents, and three aunts and a great aunt.

d x

OK, I'm dim, what is a SLANKET?

AAAAARRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH my pet hate is when people don't say thank you.

As children we had to write thank you letters, and likewise, I expect a thank you (in some shape or form) when I have given a gift.

What I CANNOT accept is that in this day and age, when people have the choice of writing a letter, writing an e.mail, making a phone call or sending a text and they still cannot say thank you!!!! I find that unacceptable and plain bad manners. Communication is easier now than it has ever been.

A couple of years ago I stopped sending my stepdaughter presents (she still gets from my hubby/her Dad, but I used to send a nice girly gift from me)....but I do not any more because she never ever says thank you, or even acknowledges receipt. When she was younger I used to (reluctantly) let it go, but now that she's 25 yrs old, I really think she's old enough to know better. How her Dad lets it go I cannot fathom, she doesn't thank him either, but if she were my own daughter she'd have got a good talking to by now!!.

There!!! Got that off me chest!!

K x

P.S. And while we are on the subject ...out of 10 Christmas gifts we sent, we have so far received 2 thank you's - by texts from my teenage nephews.

I was brought up to write thank you letters and my own children have always done so too. Even when they were tiny they would help write a message by adding a little scribble or a drawing.

We were talking about thank you letters over Christmas Dinner and our now grown up daughters said how much they appreciate receiving thank yous from children they give gifts to and how now they realise how important it is.

I try to write my own letters before the New Year. Some people I see and thank and others I will have phoned but we all open presents with a pad and pencil next to us so we can record who gave us what.

I have two (now adult) godsons. One never sent me a single thank you note for gifts so I am no longer in touch with him. The other wrote little letters and he is still on my Christmas Card list!

I have noticed the same trend for wedding presents. We gave a gift to a couple in the summer (I actually engraved them a little glass bowl and if sold in a gallery it would fetch quite a bit) but we never heard a word about it. My older daughter has been to three weddings this year and said not one of the couples has said thank you for presents. I think this is very rude.

I think I might write a few letters this afternoon!

Sue

Yes alway encouraged my Children to either say thanks if handed a Present. Or a Phone call, Card or note for those they didn't recieve personally.

My Grandchildren are always encouraged to do the same.
They even say Thank you Grandma if I have looked after them as they leave.

I also would like to know what a SLANKET is please?

Regards
Jackie

Those look fun!
http://www.theslanket.com/

Hadn't seen any till I googled.

Sue

Thanks Sue
They do look fun I have never heard of Slankets before.

Regards
Jackie

They look very cosy

xx

I always expected mine to give thanks for presents. I make it a habit to e-mail or write to businesses that have given us good service during the year. We have had such thoughtful care from some. And you know yourselves how pleasing it is when anyone bothers.

Slankets I got from QVC a while ago