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My ill father has recently revealed to me that I may have a Half sister from an affair he had in the early 1970's. She may not know of my existence. I want advice, possibly of an organisation, in doing this properly and sensitively, I do have her email address but I feel it inappropiate to contact her in this way. Does anyone know of an organisation, that can help with this kind of circumstance? Salvation Army does not get involved in this kind of scenario. She was on Friends Reunited until Christmas, but not anymore. Can anyone help me please with some sound advice?

ok I'll start the ball rolling, my gut reaction is to do nothing, it could open a can of worms and you would get the blame.
We get so many requests for sick relatives wanting to know details, when they have had all their lives to make contact,
Lindsey

You may have, or you do have?? - I'd make absolutely 100% certain I had the right person before I even thought about how to make contact

JOAN ALLAN.

Joan is a member of GR.

She is very experienced at putting adoptees in touch with their birth Familys....and vice versa.

Cant remember her web site addy for a min.....something like.....
Myfolks.....

Gerri x


Found it...

http://www.myfolks.co.uk/

You can also talk to Joan on her land line.

I have PM'd you Joans phone number (which is on her web site too)

its an email address, email her, what have u got to lose? she might be trying to find you, life is to short to sit and wait, i met my dad when i was 26 and the rest of the family and found i had a 7 year old brother, so like i said what u got to lose, go for it u might be surprised. good luck

Know all too well of the conflict of feelings. Have just found a photograph of my mother holding a baby about 6 months old. Problem is, the baby was named "my baby" Jean, and the photograph was taken before I was born.

There are no birth registrations so, who was she, and where did she go to, and why? I no longer have anyone left alive to ask.

M.David

Have you looked for a birth reg in your Mothers maiden name?
Maybe she had the baby before she married?

Gerri x

Joan Allen is a good bet - she will not only advise you what to doo, but will be able to make sure your research is watertight before proceeding.

She does make a charge, but its a reasonable one

Calm down girls.

Chill out

kathryn B

you want to learn to grow up, you do gooder lol, now go away nicely,

dont ou just hate it when people think they know it all, get a life girl,

I think Kath was concerned that the information being added on two different threads/boards could become confusing.

dont see how it would, only to people with half a brain, but there u go, i am not getting into a slagging match about it, i was only trying to help,

I dont see how it would cause confusion,,,,,,,,and I dont see how sound advise was or has been given by said Kathryn who self admits having NO experience in these matters, so her time is not being wasted!!,,,,,and has no given right to tell other members to delete their theads,!


To Maria,
Cold call email wouldnt be the correct way which Im glad you feel right about,,plus they may not be the right person ,only the same name
,also more proof would be needed before any contact move was taken,so many things to take into concideration,like her mother,and or parents
,but on the plus side she may have knowledge of her biological father,,perhaps he should be the one concidering taking the first steps,?

Dont forget too that the mother of the supposed daughter might have also been married and her husband didnt know about the affair.

He might have brought up the daughter as his own.

Thanks to all of you for advice, and apologies for any confusion, did not mean to cause any trouble. I have been on the phone to Joan and her advice was extremely helpful, she is a good kind person!

Thanks again,

Maria

Joan will be the one to help if anyone can - she'll natter for England given half a chance.

Good on you - sound advice given, listened to and acted upon - result all round

Yes Kathryn,,it was and if you have no conception as regards adoption or half siblings like some of us have then you really wont be able to offer any yourself would you.............?

Marie,

I think you do need to find out a bit more about your half sister before you proceed, is there anyway of finding out if she knows about your father.
Check with Joan or search yourself and see if her mother was either married at the time or married later, if could be that she does not know about your father and calls another person Dad.
Whatever, you do you need to be sensitive about all this.... but I wish you the Best of Luck, with whatever you decide !

Sheila

Hi Marie
i would just like to say i joined this site in july last year looking for my dad all i had was his name and address we lived at in 1965 within ten mins of being on here i found out i had 2 half sisters and 1 half brother i have since met my brother and 1 of my sisters and there ( and my ) familys and i am over the moon they are older than me and wrer able to give me lots of info on my dad and also photos they knew about me but i did not know about them but i am so glad we found eachother i feel like i belong they have excepted me as i am part of the family it has took me 42 years but now we are all intoutch we will stay that way . Hope all goes well
Alyson xx