General Chat

Hi, Brian,

So sorry to hear of your problem.

Like Taff, I was left to bring up three children and money has always been very tight. Now I keep a record of all I spend on computer.

My average monthly bills are about £1,140, but this is for EVERYTHING - Rent, Council Tax, electricity, car, clothes, some food. Both of us work in hospitality so our food bill is about half what it should be.

I think you are being taken for a ride, just like Taff and me.

Maybe she is also shopping for a local friend or member of family and is taking the cash in exchange for the shopping?

Or she may simply not know how to budget. Did she have to budget before - can you see from old bank statements what your shop used to be?

It could be that she just hasn't thought to scale down the cost of living - does she pay towards the bills at all?

Forgot to say 2 yrs later and the court is still going on, whatever she wants she gets. He is so close to having a nervouse breakdown.
Good luck.

You can get your solicitor to ask for a copy of the bills which she can print off.

Think she is taking you for a ride. My brother is going through the courts too he had 5 days to get out of his house, she got all the money in the bank.
He went unemployed to get himself legal aid.

Can you buy cigs online at tesco? Does she smoke? Mind you saying that both OH and I smoke - there is just the two of us and the cats and we are fortunate enough not to have to budget on the shop - but we dont spend anywhere near that inc cigs for two smokers.

Hi Brian

I worked for Tesco for many years and shopped on line. When you order they send you a confirmation to your email address with all the stuff itemized. As someone has already said they sell more than just food, Tesco Direct deliver everything - wine, furniture, toys, electricals etc., it does sound to me as if she is shopping for more than just food. I know this is sneeky but if you know her email account and password you could go in and take a look......
Good luck
Lesley x

omg, Brian, your being taken for a ride, the shoe was on the other foot with me, and my ex never paid apenny towards theupbringing of our 3 kids....
She should be lucky to have a bloke like you that is willing to step up to the plate!!!!
xxxx
hope it works out for you.

I can't imagine a shopping bill like that. She's obviously not buying the Basics range of foods and cooking meals from scratch.
It does sound to me as if she is squirrelling money away. If she isn't getting cashback then she must be buying some really expensive ready made dinners.

Has she always tended to overspend or do you think she is doing this to spite you?

I'm sorry to hear you are going through this.

Sue

If the shopping is always done on the net...you cant get cashbacks if you shop online, you would need to go in store for that.

From memory of shopping online with Tescos then you can view your order history if you know the email address and password for the account.

Perhaps they have been doing christmas shopping? Tescos sell more than food.

Best wishes though...divorce is a horrible business for all concerned.

As soon as I saw the amount at Tesco - all I thought of like Liz was cashbacks.

You need itemized receipts.

Thanks Janice

Nite NiteX

It's a cruel world sometimes. Good luck for the future.

Yes Janice it's been going on for quite a while now, balls in her court.

Trouble is it's not in my name, & believe me iv'e had good advice from more than one solicitor, which by the way are costing an absalute fortune

Surely still set time period between Decree Nisi and application for Decree Absolute? Do you both have legal representation?

Well thanks all, needless to say i shan't be on the boards to much longer, she can apply for the decree absalute whenever she likes, i then have to move out & she gets to keep the house i worked hard & payed for on MY OWN for another 5 years till my daughter finishes her education, i may then get 25% of the sale. P****D off i ain't

Sorry didn't read your last, but maybe she is comfort shopping, trying to make up for what she didnt have when young? There is a very good site called debtwizard,com that gives loads of help free.You must be very worried, so hope you sort it soon.

Hadn't thaught of cashback, now i AM thinking

Itemised receipt may be required - not just cc bills.

Thanks Liz, i was begining to think around that.