General Chat

Ann Dont you worry at all.... LOL.... My mum did the same thing to me on my 8th birthday and I have never been able to use sheild since!! Apart from that it didnt do me any harm though... I still swore though but always made sure mum didnt hear me ... LOL Shaz xx

Probably in this day and age I would be had up for cruelty but some 40 years ago my daughter picked up the expression - 'little bitch' from the little girl next door - I ignored it - it continued - I said it wasn't nice - it continued. The one day I grabbed a bar of soap and just stuck the end of it on her tongue and told her I would do that each time she said the nasty thing. IT WORKED! I must also say that at this time there was absolutely no swearing in our house at all - I hadn't learned to - have since! Ann

Sioux You really made me laugh! I think a substitute word is good. When my son was little and lost his temper he used to show me how angry he was by slapping the floor and blowing raspberries. It was so funny but I did understand what he was trying to communicate as best as he could at the time! They are such good mimics aren't they Emma? It is only when they echo it back at you, you realise how you sound! Abigail

What a nightmare! Lots of great advice already given, I particularly like ideas of making words seem really bad 'make it sound like a bad word, but use a nice word like' bother' and less offensive words like this. Kids listen to our toning, (not what we say but, how we say it.) Children are incredibly sharp. I have a four year old who acts like a 24 year old. She challenges me if I'm sharp or stroppy to someone else, she'll say ' Mummy, you're being rude, or you're being mean!!!' If I'm telling her off she listens and says 'sorry Mum, I won't ever do it again!' the sincerity is so humbling, she's taught me SO much about how agressive I am, and how being nicer really does work...if you're sincere. Still working on that one!

Our eldest's first word were oh s**t, he's 16 now and wouldn't dare swear in front of me. I presume they do it at school, but I've warned him I never want to hear it and he respects that. The funniest and also most embarrasing moment was when he was about 3 and a policeman smilled at him sat there in his buggy .... my little darling smiled sweetly back at him pointed and said ' fascist opressor' I could have killed my hubby!! Needless to say we made a hurried departure. XX Sioux :~D

My two hear my shouting my 'swear' word. 'Oh for fff......five pence'!!!! and coppy that! If they do say anything they shouldn't, I tell them it is not nice and I am ignoring them now. All kids try it on don't they? At least mine do! Claire xx

I usually ignore the bad behaviour and reward the good, by giving any attention to 'swearing' is still rewarding him with your attention, might take abit of time to sink in but it will eventally, the best method is to take a favourite thing away everytime they swear or send them to bed early and keep it quick with as less talking as possible......makes them think about what they ve done, I would sit him down first and explain that from now on every time he says 'that' word which is a 'disgusting' word that he will have something taken away or out of his room or that he ll miss his fav programme etc, always ask if they ve understood what you ve just said. Good luck.

My son who's 8 and wouldn't swear (even if you paid him) was in the car with mum the other day when another car pulled right out in fron of her and she swore, then quickly said sorry to my son. who casually replied 'that's ok my mum swears all the time i'm used to it'. cheek. lol Nicky.x

i lIKED ALL THE STORIES-I think it is a thing that happens in all families, best not to mke a big thing of it with tots,Biggies I think it is a bit different,they know better. I am in jail most days and the eff word is punctuation,but they all say 'sorry Miss' like little kids if they think I have heard them. I think repetative use of swear words as I've described is sad as it shows that you have a very limited vocabulary ,personally I shall be adopting Gladioli and Valadivostok from now on and using my own standy by which has seen me through the years Agony-Bath-Buns ? Don't ask Rose

My youngest son now 25, went through a swearing patch when he was about 4, I just ignored him and he stopped after a few days, now his 4 year old daughter is doing the same thing so we are ignoring her, been 2 days now and think she's stopped hopefully. jennifer

Tried it all Emma with my lot... reverse Psychology, telling off, ignoring, removing, laughing etc. Someone here has said a good slap usually works and I'll probably be shot down in flames here but what the hell... it worked on mine!! (whilst they were small at least) Eldest now almost 19 and apologises if a swear word slips out in my presence. Another of mine... aged 15 felt my hand at the weekend when she went into a strop and came out with a load of swear words. Youngest of mine is only 3yrs and thinks he has this sussed.... he told me last night that his dad was really doing his effing head in!! Yes he said effing and not the word itself... he still got told off for it though. Have to say that when my now 8yr old was about two her fav word was the one that sounds like Banker but then she stopped saying it, I didnt tell her off I kept telling the older ones off as it was them she was getting it from. Strangely enough she never swears at all now not even in a slip up which usually gives it away and lets you know they do it regular in the playground. Shaz xx

OH...TULIP HELL!!

I read a book once called 'Nanny Knows best' which was great. Her advice when a child swear or has a tantrum is to laugh at them. It worked every time with my 4.

I have two excellent swear words I use when the wee 'uns are around. Vladivostock and Gladioli

A child is constantly seeking attention, any type of attention. If you tell them off, smack, punish or whatever, they have gained your attention. I worked as a nanny for several years and when the little darlings tried to get a reaction by swearing, I ignored them. Within a couple of days of no reaction whatsoever, they get bored of it.

My Mum once had a swearing outburst without realising George could hear and we now call all rude words 'Nanny Words' If he hurts himself or feels the need to use an expletive he just says 'oh - nanny word!' - works for us !!!

I tried the naughty step thing i have seen on many programs about naughty kids...it didnt work he keeps getting off! He has also started forcing me to do things....such as if he wants a drink he will stand by the sink and ask for juice, if anyone else offers it to him he kicks them and wants me to get it!!! Little Bugger!!

I had to laugh, because I had that prob with my son. He was, and is, good as gold, but used to swear aged 2. I took his Teletubby videos away for a day every time he swore. It soon stopped. My sister says the best thing is ignore it and he'll stop because he's not getting a reaction from you.

I work with children with behavioural problems, the advice we give parents is to remember humans are animals and we are 'pack' animals like wolves, lions etc. So if a child is doing something they shouldn't exclude them from the pack. I don't mean send of to bedroom and forget though I mean sit in a corner away from everyone and be ignored until appropriate behaviour can start again. Worked a treat with my 3 who are all adults now and readily admit to having hated missing out on watching cartoons and eating goodies with the rest of us when they were in their 'corners' ! Good luck

LOL glad i am not alone!! My mother was horrified yesterday when she heard him swear. So embarassing!!