General Chat

Finally cracked and put both kids to bed for not even trying their tea. No milk, just water and the briefest of cuddle. Now I'm feeling the weirdest combination of frustration and guilt.

What was for tea? xxhugxx

How old are they?

Was it something they disliked the taste and look of?

RB I had exactly the same with my son - trying to coax him into eating it and then losing my temper. Eventually, I was told not to make an issue of it by the doctor - hard I know as you feel they must be hungry but I started to just throw it in the bin and eventually he started to eat. Debby

Fritata - It was probably inedible in their eyes - but that's not the point. I was trying to find something that would appeal to both of them. I expect them to try before they make faces. The little one (nearly three) wont eat anything unless it's scambled egg, toast, pasta pesto or baked beans. She used to eat almost anything, including a wide variety of fruit, but now wont touch it. The previously fussy eldest has expanded her repetoir, but turns up her nose at EVERYTHING EVERYDAY until she actually tries it. I am fed up serving beans or egg on toast. I am fed up meal times. I am fed up with not being able to feed my kids healthily because they wont co-operate. The eldest has gone straight to sleep. The little one is sobbing, probably because her usual bedtime routine with milk didn't happen.

seems to me you are locked into battle with them- and they are winning. Why cook a fritata when they'll eats eggs? Its a phase, theyll grow out of it if you dont lose your sanity first Jess

wats 'fritata' ?

RB I have this will my son and have been to a dietician with him. He has an aversion to food because of the textures and the tought that meat has been running around. Was told to go at his pace otherwise it will put him back. Can't believe he ate a whole breaded chicken fillet in a bun tonight. My rule for oldest is try it if don't like it fair enough. I have done the same as you in the past and like yours my eldest usually falls asleep. Could you not just pop a bit of milk up to littleun but don't say anything just give it to them and walk out again, that way they haven't won and it might settle them at bit. Next its your turn to take a few deep breaths and remember you have done nothing wrong if they were that hungry they will eat there's no way on this earth they will starve themselves if food is there. Stay by the puter and have a laugh with this lot .

Rugby Widow.. Please rethink your decision.. your children will have huge eating problems if you punish them for not eating their meals! It really is best to allow a child to eat what ever they are happy to eat, than to upset one and all over food. Better that they eat what they like than nothing at all. Maz x

Oh I do sympathise! My little lad was just the same, he has always been a worry to me about what he will or wont eat and I even took him to the doctors and he said he is healthy and happy and well within his weight range and not to worry too much. Now he has started full time nursery and guess what, he eats everything they put in front of him and on the days I give him a packed lunch he eats all that aswell, so things will get better Im sure of it. Goodluck Marie

Lou, have you never seen the lion egg advert? Fritatta is like an omelet . I do agree with you thought, if you are at the end of your string, they are not going to starve and they are better in bed if you are getting wound up. jess

My theory always was, they will eat when they are hungry and drink when they are dry. But please do not punish them for not eating it could start all sorts of problems, if someone put something in front of you that you did not like, would you eat it? xxhugxx

Re the fritata. I thought perhaps as the little one likes eggs and the eldest tolerates them and liked the extras, we might have found a mutually acceptable tea. It would appear I will be cooking three separate teas for the next few years, two of which will be frequently rejected on whim, one will be eaten in less time than it takes to walk it to the table. Ah well. Littlest has just said 'No' to trying her tea again and gone to sleep.

thanx jess :-)

I wouldn't force mine to eat. I had a similar problem when my daughter was little suddenly refusing to eat. I found what she liked and gave it her, she grew out of it eventually.She wouldn't touch an egg but got her to eat the yolk, one day said to her dad make sure she eats that she likes them now. Not thinking he made her eat the white, she promptly threw it up and she didn't touch another egg for over 20 years. She has the same problem now with her little one. Be patient they will grow out of it. When they are older they will try things as you will be able to reason better with them. For now indulge them and sneak a little bit of something different to them now and again. Don't try and hide the sprouts in the cabbage though LOL they spot that. Germaine x

All is calm in the camp then, good I'll tell you now, My mum Did it to me when I was small and I cried till i made myself sick - she never did it again. I agree, you shouldnt be subjected to kiddie choices and nor have to cook 3 meals to satisfy all. Can you give them something they like for say, lunch, then as you know they have had a reasonable meal ( and strangled Egg on toast is a lot better than many lunches I could name) Just present them with a titchy portion of what you have chosen for tea and then just say ''well, get down then, if you dont want it'' They'll not starve, and they'll get bored far quicker than you. (1/2 dozen smarties for the one that eats the titchy tea though) jess x

I'm kind of in the business as, though I am an administrator, I work in the early years nutritional field for Government. I also had the same problem as you with my eldest who has just turned 7. He started off as a toddler willing to try everything, then backtracked and refused all but a very few things. We kept putting the things he was refusing - mainly salad items and veg - on the table at every meal and we all dug in even though he ignored them so they weren't wasted. After months of this, and years in the case of some veg, he decided to have a try. Now apart from anything that looks like a leaf he'll have a go at most things I serve. I can't pretend it was easy getting here, and I'm glad I don't have it all in front of me but we did get there and you will. My personal tip would be cut new foods into small/attractive pieces and put it into in lots of small plastic bowls on the table for kids to help themselves. Giving kids pitta pockets or tortillas to fill for themselves from the bowls goes down well in our house. We also create games around healthy food - for example we open our sugar snap peas to see which of us has the most 'money', make salad gardens on our plates, and mashed potato faces with veggie features. It relieves tension at mealtimes and makes them much less stressful. Angela

RW another thing that have thought of that works with us is if we put the food in dishes in the middle of table and let them help themselves they seem to eat more than if put on a plate for them. And as for cooking three different meals thats what its like in our house, hell at times but like you sure we will get there in the end

Thanks all. I kept it calm on the outside, but the inside has calmed down as well now. The eldest was a fussy eater with a tiny appetite when she was smaller, but had a repetoir that covered all the food groups so I didn't worry. Once she started school meals she opened up to all sorts. She usually tries something because she has learnt a few times that it sometimes tastes better than it looks. I'm more worried about littlest who is now rejecting almost everything and hasn't eaten anything resembling fruit or veg (apart from Bkd Beans) in weeks. (Still drinks fruit juice). Ah well. Deep breath. Thanks for your time and input. She wont starve and beans on toast is suposed to be highley nutricious, right?