General Chat

Real men are in danger of extinction. That's the controversial view of Harvard professor Harvey Mansfield, who believes that manliness is a dying virtue — destroyed by feminists. Here, Dr Mansfield, 73, argues his case. Ask any woman a generation or so ago what she admired in a man and she'd almost certainly have said 'manliness'. Women 50 years ago wanted their men to be fearless, chivalrous, honourable and self-confident. They wanted men who showed a stiff upper lip. Their heroes were ultra-manly Hollywood stars such as Humphrey Bogart and John Wayne. They admired thrill-seeking writers such as Ernest Hemingway. Their men didn't think they were at death's door every time they got a cold. They didn't check in the mirror for the first grey hair and they certainly didn't read style magazines. Cashmere, silk boxer shorts and anything at all from Italy were a 'no no'. (Who'd want to buy clothes from such a soppy country?) In short, women wanted manly men, not wimps. According to the dictionary, manliness means 'having a man's virtues of courage, frankness etc' — but it has become a dirty word. We're in danger of destroying virtues such as bravery, loyalty, restraint and self-sacrifice. Instead, we risk producing men who are selfish, feckless and unfaithful. They may help with the washing up — but they aren't necessarily going to respect women or show commitment. That's why I'm appealing to today's educated women to help bring manliness back. Not just for men's sake — but for women's, too. If men are embarrassed to be men, then women also suffer. Manly men are faithful not just from a sense of love but also honour. Sensitive, empathetic men may seem attractive; but if they're sensitive to your needs, the chances are they'll be just as sensitive to the needs of every other woman to come their way. Unlike manly men, they're not compelled from a sense of honour to be faithful.

I agree. What are your thoughts? Brian (i)

I'd love to have a 'Manly' man :O))) And I love my man to be manly and protective and faithfull - but at the same time I would still retain many elements of my 'independence' because that is now ingrained in me due to many years of 'man-less-ness' xxxx

Boys smell! lol xx

I must be old fashioned then (at the age of 32) as that's what I prefer in Men - and my Husband would definitely agree. Funnily enough I had a Lady come to read my Gas Meter this morning and I mentioned that my Husband made the cupboard it is housed in and she commented that her Husband would never do anything like that! Having said that though, I'm not one of those silly, wimpy, girly types - I have a strong Feminist/Independent streak andI couldn't be with a Man who was a push over and a wimp. lol Kaye ;-)

Ah, but if 'manly' men allowed themselves to be destroyed so easily, surely they can't have been that 'manly' in the first place. :-))

All this equality with men is rubbish,I preferred the old days when women were superior to men !!!! Lol

Some interesting points there. It changed over the years. most polls of recent years I saw , said that ladies 'wanted a man who would make them laugh'. Now we have political or sexual correctness. Perhaps we are evolving. 'You never know what you had, till it,s gone'. Happy days

Hello Bec. Girls smell too. I like the smell of girls. Shady Lady accepts that men are superior to women! -:)) Brian (i)

Oh no I dont Brian ! I said we were superior to men until equality forced us down to your level ,now we are only equal to you. Get with it man !!! Lol x

Shady Lady. I can/will accept and agree to that. You should have said that in the first place. Now waiting for Bec's reply :-)). Brian (i)

I did you twerp ! Read my first posting and you will see that I did. What are you like . PMSL xx

Most real men just get on with their lives,and most real women let them get on with it. no discussion as to what they should or should,nt be doing,they just share their lives equally as partners,whatever needs doing they do together,and enjoy each moment together,whatever. Hal.

Nobody denies that Harold , but we are just having a laugh here and theres no harm in that is there ? x

The last sentence (or part of) is always the one that stands out most. In this case had you put it the other way round it would have been more to your favour :-)). Brian (i) That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it :-)))

Shady Lady,Nothing wrong at all in having a laugh,I myself enjoy one,However some people tend to believe all they read. Hal.L.H.S.O. :0<)))))))))

My work colleague has just finished with her boyfriend. She found him putting lip gloss on and could not take him seriously after that !

Hi Brian Give me a real man to test an i'll let you know

Gwen you mean there are some about ??? Lol

Gwen. If you had made that offer some thirty, forty or fifty years ago I would have taken the challenge. To late now I'm afraid. 'When I was young and in my prime I could do that any time. But now I'm old and getting (got) grey, I cannot do the same today'. Brian (i)