General Chat

(inspired by something that has been said on another thread) see below

Do you find it more offensive if you hear a woman swearing than a man?

Not really..... However I don't like certain words used in every day conversation. Everyone swears when they're angry, which is fair enough, but if people can't say a simple sentance without c-ing or f-ing, then they should have their gobs surgically sealed shut.

I agree with Paul, especially around children! A 4 year old in the street told my 13 year old to F*** O** the other day, my 13 year old was really shocked as she doesn't swear but this child hears it from his parents all the time. Tammy :~)

There is a woman who goes in my local every other word is swear word I dont think she knows she is doing at times. Davex

hate it, smacks to me of people that cant say anything more intelligent! They rather lack vocabulary maybe? Whilst we are on the subject ....its not swaering but it akin to Whya do people on here keep saying PMSL? yes, i know what it stands for, but do they REALLY say it as often in 'real life' and if not, why say it here? (or on any website) Jess

I must admit I agree Tammy, swearing around children is not on As you say Paul, some people seem to think certain words are an acceptable part of everyday language. I must admit that although I do on occassion sound like the proverbial fish wife I find it more unpleasant when I hear a woman swearing than when a man uses the same expressions Dee ;-))

Hi Jess Not sure about that one. I tend not to use the board abbreviations, (PMSL, LOL) etc and I am sure there are people on here that probably think I am a boring old f**t because I don't!!! The use of them is, in my opinion, a way for people to show that they are fun loving and just having a laugh After all we are unable to see each others body language and facial expressions on here ;-)))

I remember when I was walking to school one day, one of those mobility buses was on the side of the road, ready to pick up a boy who has cerebal pausy (Sp?) like they do every day. One day the boy dropped something, and I just remember the whole street echoing with 'Dylan you f-ing idiot' Felt so sorry for the poor kid.

Morning Dee I hate swearing. I have never used a swearword in public and I have never used what I call the really dreadful ones at all but I have to confess that on a vey few occassions when I have stubbed my toe at home or done something equally painful I have been known to mutter 'oh sugar' lol:) Only when it really hurts though:) As for the LOL etc, I agree with you. I do it so that people will know I am joking and not serious. Though I never use PMSL, only LMHO because I wouldn't use that word in speech. A lot of my friends do though and it doesn't worry me. Chrissie x p.s. I can't agree FF that the child needed a slap though - the mother perhaps:)

Hi Dee, yes i'm afraid to say i am of the old school, and was taught not to swear infront of women, and try not to, and dislike women using four letter word's.

Sorry FF, I don't think so. I think the little one needed a new Mum who would teach him gently why you don't swear and kick up a rumpus in the supermarket. Sounds more like he needed a bit of love and encouragement than a slap. Chrissie x

nudge

Sadly children learn their language skills from their parents. I tend to agree with Chrissie that the child doesn't need a slap, it is the mother that needs some kind of help. If the mother is swearing at the child out of anger and frustration then there may be other issues that need looking into If the mother uses that language as 'normal' then it shows a lack of vocabulary, and her child is likely to just pick up the words with no idea what they mean A friend, who is a social worker, once heard her child use a swear word. She explained to him exactly what it meant and said he could use the word only if he used it in its correct context Many days later a child used the word in the classroom, her child told the teacher exactly what the word meant, and she was called into the school and reprimanded for telling her child the meaning of the word!!! Strange world we live in Dee ;-)))

I swear but not every time I open my mouth and never in front of children. Like others have said, find it appalling when parents eff and blind at their children. For me, it's not the lack of vocabulary that causes me to swear - it adds force. I feel so much better saying 'B* hell!' rather than 'Dear oh dear' and calling someone a 'daft b*gger' is part of my humour, I'm afraid. And many punchlines are made funnier by the odd expletive. (in my opinion) I find coarse language used constantly tedious rather than offensive and, yes, I do find it less acceptable in women. I shouldn't perhaps but I do. I don't use the eff word often - but do, yet the 'c' word is a no no as far as I'm concerned and I hate hearing it used. A self imposed double standard, I suppose. Mags xx

Have to say Mags that when I was talking about swearing I wasn't thinking of the '*B*! hell' (for relief) or the 'daft *b.gger* (for fun) type of swearing. Not many of us haven't used them from time to time I'll wager. I was talking about what I call 'todays' swearing. The constant f,b and c words that seem to have become part of everyday life for some people. Chrissie x

Interesting Lee that you say you were taught not to swear in front of women My late father in law was foreman in a factory just after the war. He regularly used bad language to the women on the shop floor, and explained his behaviour by saying it was the only language they understood.!!!!! He would never have dreamt of talking to his wife that way, and certainly would not have found it acceptable for anyone else to speak to her that way. Perhaps there is an unwritten code that men tone their language down in mixed company, but on the other hand some people seem to think that using bad language impresses people ;-))

For the first 40 years of my life I never said anything worse than damn. Then I went to work in catering. The language was unbelievably coarse and I spent my first week there in a constant blush. Now, I'm afraid, I swear a lot - but it depends where I am and who I am talking to. I wouldnt swear in front of strangers or indeed in front of anyone who doesnt swear themselves. This leaves me free to swear like a trooper with a few friends. It is not a lack of vocabulary that makes me swear, it is the peculiarly satisfactory emphasis you can put on certain words. I dont find the swear words offensive, it is the tone in which they are used which causes offence to me. All swear words have their roots in the english language and were once used in everyday conversations, not as swear words, but as descriptive adjectives. The F word, which causes such offence, is from the latin word fecit, which means 'to do' - what is offensive about that? Incidentally, I got my mouth washed out with soap as a child for saying Hell - its all relative, isnt it? OC

I'm much the same as OC - it depends who I'm around. My Mother has always been very strict about swearing and is offended by it, therefore I don't swear in front of her - unless it's the odd teasing word, but never anything as strong as the 'f' word or the horrible 'c' word. I also agree about swearing around children - it makes me cringe to hear young kids swearing at each other. It's a subject I disagree with my Husband on - he has a 12 year old Son and has always used swear words in front of him, I think it's wrong and will tell him off if I hear him doing it. However, his Son does know not to use those words himself and would get a pretty stiff telling off from his Dad if he did - double standards really. I think some words are more acceptable than others though and often it's the tone and context in which they're used - like someone else said calling someone a 'daft B' in jest isn't the same as calling someone something much stronger in an angry tone. I'm not offended personally by people swearing, but do think that people who f and blind continually show a lack of intelligence - it may not be the case but that's how it looks. Having said that, if I was out for a drink with my Husbands family who all swear like troopers, then I would be much the same. lol Kaye x

Kaye and OC I tend to agree that we often adjust our language to fit in with the group we happen to be with at the time. That applies not only with swearing though. It is a case of using appropriate language for the situation you are in. At the end of the day we want to be accepted by the group we are with at any one time, so adapt accordingly. ;-))