General Chat

I certainly like the idea about naming a Star xxxx a beautiful idea x Elaine ;-)

Thanks everybody for your lovely words and ideas. God Bless you all.

I have already planted a miniture apple tree for Stephen, and when I pick the apples I will think of Stephen.

Hello Jennifer xxx .... tis very difficult choosing the right words for your son, your family and yourself. There are some beautiful moving verses amongst the replies ... hope you find one that is relevant to you and your family very soon.... Has you know my son died in 2001 and within 7 months knew his dad had terminal cancer .... bought the a second plot immediately (they are now toe to toe) we let my son's children choose inscription for their dad's headstone and we has a family chose my husbands .... i have just returned from cemetary offices and have got the name of the person i should ask permission off to place a memorial bench seat .... after speaking with her i am optomistic. Take care love thinking of you (((((((hugs))))) Patricia xxx

Jess, I was thinking just that. A young tree, what a lovely memorial for Stephen. Jennifer, have you had any thoughts on this? I think it'd be a lovely way to remember Stephen, seeing it grow. x

I was a a Humanist funeral for a friend today and there were some readings of poems. Having read this thread I thought I'd have a look at what could turn up if I searched on the internet for suitable quotes and poems. This site seems to have a number of ones which I've heard used and also some new ones I think might be a comfort. (Remove brackets) http://www.memories-are-forever.org(/)funeral(/)poemsquotes(.)htm Sue

I'm poking my nose in here a bit as I haven't been on the boards for ages. Jennifer, your message struck a chord because when my brother died I couldn't decide what to put on my message in the local newspaper. I came across this Quote that I had saved in a book............. We buried his hands but not his good works. We buried his heart but not his love. Hope this helps.

What about a tree?

Goodnight folks!

You really need to check with the cemetery/churchyard first to see what sort of memorial is allowed. You may find that anything other than a gravestone may be removed, as it will not be permitted. Don't want to be the bearer of bad news, but some are very strict on what can and can't be used. It would be terrible for you if you put something on his grave, only for it to be removed. AL

God said: “I'll lend you my Child ... ” I'll lend you for a little time a child of mine, He said ... For you to love the while he lives ... and mourn for when he's dead. It may be six or seven years, or twenty-two and three, But will you, till I call him back, take care of him for me? He'll bring his charms to gladden you. And shall his stay be brief; You'll have his lovely memories as solace for your grief. I cannot promise he will stay, since all from Earth return. But there are lessons, taught down there, I want this child to learn. I've looked the wide world over in search for teachers true, And from the throngs that crowd life's lanes, I have selected you. Now ... will you give him all your love ... nor think the labour in vain? Nor ... hate me when I come to call ... to take him back again? I fancied that I heard you say ... “Dear Lord, it will be done! “For all the joy Your Child shall bring, the risk of grief we'll run. “We'll shelter him with tenderness. We'll love him while we may, “And for the happiness we've known ... forever grateful stay. “But shall the angels call for him much sooner than we've planned, “We'll brave the bitter grief that comes ... and try to understand.” *

God Bless you Brian-life is so tough.

Jennife, how about having a star named after him. I have heard of this being done.

did he have any special interests, somethink that could be engraved on slate. maybe a sport that he participated in or enjoyed watching, or a hobby. Ann Glos

I am so sorry for your loss, Jennifer. Those are all beautiful words aren't they? If you are wanting ideas for a permanent memorial rather than a headstone, I bought an altar cloth and pulpet fall for the church where my Mum was baptised, married, worshipped and was buried. A framed 'in memorium' and details of the gift hangs in the church. I know she would have liked this, as the brass flower vases on the altar are in memory of her father and other linen in memory of her mother. My neighbour was tragically killed in a RTA - he was not a church goer, but his family bought a bench for the churchyard and planted a rose garden. They go and sit on the seat and look at his garden. I am sure that in the weeks to come, you will be able to focus on your son's hobbies and interests and find just the right way of commerating his short time with you. Jay

Jennifer. I feel a bit full myself. Those are the verses that we were choosing for my wife's Rememberance Card last year. Brian (i)

Brian, can you send me a box of tissues please

Found it. No, perhaps not, ok for a funeral thanksgiving service. “If I should go before the rest of you Break not a flower nor inscribe a stone, Nor when I'm gone speak in a Sunday voice But be the usual selves that I have known. Weep if you must, Parting is hell, But life goes on, So sing as well.” Joy

We want to tell you something, So there won't be any doubt, You're so wonderful to think of, But so hard to be without. We cannot bring the old days back, When we were all together, The family chain is broken now, But memories live forever. Brian (i)

I do not know, Stephen was a thinker, and always deep in thought-he was my eldest Son, but rather than a head stone I need something young for him- any suggestions