General Chat

the way you wanted?

this prompted by a conversation I've just been having, I think it's fair to say my life has not turned out the way my mum hoped it might, I 'did as she did, not as she said' lol.

I look at Dan, who is vastly different to me in his interests and is infinitely more 'laid back' when it comes to worrying and wonder whether he will 'get it right' :-)

Not sure what I wanted, Rose, but happy how he turned out.

Glad my Dad lived long enough to see him get his PhD. He works in genetic research, has a full life and is very happy. We see him quite often and he's a lovely lad.

My parents wanted us to work hard and make the best of what we have, but most importantly to be healthy and happy.

We raised our girls to be polite, friendly and hard working. All we wished for them was to have a happy life.

So far, so good *crosses everything* :-D :-D

It was left to them,,,and have gone in directions that wasnt planned or I would have expected or themselves to be honest.
well pleased how their lives are but I dont claim any glory as choices were of their own.

My daughter was a bit of a rebellious teen, and was an unmarried mother at 17, definitely not what I'd hoped for. However, she's turned out to be a level headed, strong minded woman, and three children and a divorce later, is in the middle of a midwifery degree course at the age of 36.
She knew what she wanted, and all things considering, I'm very proud of her.

My daughter has turned out to be what I would have hoped for her. Honest, caring, employed and independent. Able to look after herself and her own litte house very well.

I was brought up with the old adage from my mother 'you need to have that bit of paper' so insisted she attended college to have some recognised qualification which I think has served her well.

My only regret is that as an only child with no family close by her social life developed in line with mine - a bit too quiet maybe.

Vera

I used to despair of my son, he hated school from day 1, and never passed an exam - he was passionate about animals and wanted to be a gamekeeper and though we tried to find something in that line for him it was useless - gamekeepers are sons of gamekeepers

Then, when I was giving up hope, he got taken on the YTS scheme with British Rail when he was sixteen - he has been on the railway ever since and at one time was the youngest driver on the rail network in this area - he's in his mid forties now, still driving trains, excellent work record and presently based at Swansea on a course for driving the high speed trains Swansea to Paddington

Considering he never passed an exam in school he is earning twice was his father ever earned and he had engineering qualifications of all sorts

Could I add that my son is not thick in any way, he has amazing general knowledge - sit with him through a quiz and he'll have all the answers - just was never suited to sitting behind a desk in a classroom

I am immensely proud of him, especially as at the moment he has suffered health problems which are hopefully being resolved in the near future and another traumatic event which is hopefully being sorted

Ann it is good to hear something positive about the YTS scheme, I was very much involved with it in my job in the 80s and saw several young people start out well in the world because of it.


Both my children have their father's brains and both have done very well in their line of work. Both work hard, now in his 40s our son has 500+ people working for him, but for that he does and awful ot of travelling as his home base if in Hertfordshire and his other two offices are in Exeter and Bournemouth, both of which he visits every week. Yes I am proud of them both, can't say I had any real plans for them except we tried to instill the work ethic. In turn they have done and are doing with their own children who are so far all doing ok.

Neither of our children went to UNi but son achieved a degree with the open university and daughter passed all her insurance exams by working at home in the evenings.

Ann - the YTS was the making of him - within the first few weeks he was awarded a commendation for his actions in extinguishing a fire on a train - he never looked back

and your children have also done very well indeed - great isn't it :-)

so far so good they all going to leave school better off than me. They have worked hard which in theory should mean their lives should be much better and easier and hopefully they won't have to make as many sacrifices as I have had to made. Saying that I do hope M hurries up and gets a job. The girls still have some schooling ahead of them, Having said all that I left school with better prospects than my parents and I have been able to do better than they did and do things like buy a house and car and I haven't had to make as many sacrifices as they did so I guess things are getting there. I'm immensely proud of them whichever direction they decide to take and will be there each step of the way for them x

Ann in Glos I left school at 15 and walked into a YTS to start when I turned 17 that was in the 80's gave me a start I wouldn't otherwise have been able to have in an age where qualifications were everything x

Your post AnnCardiff reminded me of when OH and I ran a Water Garden Nursery many many moons ago. We had a lovely lad whom came to to us on a YTS scheme aged 16. When we first knew him he was a very shy insecure young man with no qualifications and a bit inarticulate, (nerves), but my goodness he was such a hard worker and so obliging, in fact a smashing lad. At the end of his time with us he had changed out of all recognition, confident, knowledgeable and a pleasure to work with, and more than competent to work on his own. When he left us, OH gave him an excellent reference and he got a gardening job at a very large establishement near us, and is now their head chap with several guys under him. Not long after he left us, young man's parents came to see us to thank us for all we had done for their son, and for the chance that had been given to him. It's not often we felt 'YES', but on that occasion we did!
Our own children were clever and both now run their own successful buisnesses, and yes I am VERY proud of both of them.

My son is all I could have hoped he would be. He is very very clever, extremely funny. He works extremely hard, he is senior partner in his own successful law practice; but most of all he is a wonderful loving son, husband and a great father to his three step daughters. I love him and feel so proud of his achievements, but if he were not my son I would honestly say that he was a really decent man.

I wanted my son to be safe and solvent! His life has been anything but, and he is gloriously happy and fulfilled.. <3

BC That's all any of us should hope for.

Yes, I believe so, Paula :-)

Paula.....I think "loving" is the key word for me......I have a son and daughter. The son was like Ann's son hated school and I used to worry quite a lot about him, my daughter was the opposite.

They are both loving caring popular people with lots of friends etc, my daughter also being a lovely mum herself.

Daughter teaches sec school and son is a electrician. Most important thing for me is that they are both happy :-)

As you know I don´t have children, but I can say that I didn´t turn out as my parents wished. Well not in the early years.
But my Dad loved me, and appreciated me for what I was and what I achieved on my own.
Annoyingly if I had been a boy I would have been trained in Dad´s occupation, which I now wish I had pushed to go into. I always wanted to be an architect, a quantity surveyor, and a master builder. ..

I didn´t achieve what my parents wanted for me, but I made my Dad proud.

Please do not give your children YOUR goals, just be happy and steer them in the way you want but help them when they find another way.

It seems happiness is the key to everything - money comes after, and as you say BC, yours is gloriously happy and fulfilled - sorted then :-D

and well done the YTS

I never wanted anything for my 3 girls except that they are happy and healthy.
They are all doing very well but I am so grateful for one simple thing...... they absolutely adore each other!
I can relax in the knowledge that my girls will always be there for each other.
I was also one of 3 sisters and although we rub along OK, we have never had the firm sisterly bond that my own kids have.
I really count my blessings. Xxx