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Please hold this Mum in your hearts..Funeral today

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond Report 10 Feb 2008 05:38

In mid January an 18 year old lad was out with his pals but left them to go home while they went on to a nightclub. He was seen on cctv heading homewards but had to walk past the river which in 2003 claimed a young man a bit worse for wear after a night out, and had already claimed two others in a similar way. Gary was 18, a twin, and came from a loving family. He was in work and had no reason to go missing, but his family have been waiting for news of him as he never reached home. His mum was on tv appealing for help in finding him, just last week.
Yesterday the body of a man was found further down the river. It is very probably Gary's body. I can only imagine how his family and friends must be feeling, at least while there was no news, they had hope. His bosses had offered £5000 reward for information leading to his whereabouts.

If this is not Gary's body, then I hope he is found soon, and the identity of the person is soon given so his family can be notified. Knowing our river well, it is tho very probably poor Gary and I can only hope he died quickly - so awful to think of him struggling alone in the dark cold river.
Rest in peace, who ever you are.

Lizx

♥ Kitty the Rubbish Cook ♥

♥ Kitty the Rubbish Cook ♥ Report 10 Feb 2008 06:07

A friend of ours drowned at sea last year................from the time he went missing until his body was recovered was hell for his whole family.

My thoughts and prayers are with this lads family too.

xx

JustJean

JustJean Report 10 Feb 2008 07:07


Sending my love and prayers to this family.

Jean x

dutch

dutch Report 10 Feb 2008 07:59

sending thoughts and prayers to the young mans family i cant imagine what there going thru
Dutchxx

RoseoftheShires

RoseoftheShires Report 10 Feb 2008 08:02

sending love and prayers to the family how awful
Rachxx

Staffs Col

Staffs Col Report 10 Feb 2008 08:02

So tragic....I hope that at least the recovery of a body will bring closure to some poor family and allow the grieving to begin

AnninGlos

AnninGlos Report 10 Feb 2008 09:13

My thoughts are with this family. How awful - I dread to think, I have 18 and a 19 year old grandsons.


Ann
Glos

lilymoon

lilymoon Report 10 Feb 2008 10:59

love and prayers to family lilymoon

Lyndi

Lyndi Report 10 Feb 2008 11:34

Thoughts and prayers for the family.
xx

Jude(sarf wales) 7602736

Jude(sarf wales) 7602736 Report 10 Feb 2008 11:34

That is so tragic. Rest in peace who ever you are!!!! and my thoughts are with Gary's parents.

jude sarf wales xx

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond Report 10 Feb 2008 23:31

I haven't been able to catch our local news today so don't know if the body has been identified. Pound to a penny it is Gary tho, sadly.

Five years ago last Wednesday, early hours of the 6th February, a young man in his 20s drowned in the same river after a night out, our fairly newly built clubland is by the riverside. Paul had drunk a lot but was sober enough to have rung his girlfriend at uni (he was at uni here in Norwich doing teacher training). They were talking when she heard the phone being put down and a sound as tho he walked a few steps and might have vomited. He probably walked to the edge of the river to vomit not wanting to do it on the pavement and overbalanced. The next call the girl got a little while later was from the Police. People came out to try and help Paul when they heard him shouting but because of the poor lighting and high river level, and being a very cold night, he couldn't see and reach the ladders at the edge of the river, and sadly he drowned. I was furious at another loss of life, as there had been at least two more lads before Paul suffered the same fate, so I lobbied the council and local mps etc to get more safety rails installed etc. The local police put me in touch with Paul's family from Shrewsbury and we worked together to get safety measures which the council had ignored on a Rospa report they commisioned when the nightclubs and bars were built, installed. Now in that area there are special lights under the edge of the riverside so if anyone is in the water they can see the ladders. Also more railings have been installed. I met Paul's lovely family, his Mum, Dad, sister and girlfriend, at his inquest. It was harrowing to hear the witnesses, those who had heard his cries and come out to try to help, trying to find a long branch or pole to hold out to him, trying to tell him where the ladders were etc. Such a waste of a marvellous young life, Paul was training to be an R.E. teacher and had great potential. He wasn't a binge drinker, but had met with a friend who had popped over from Peterboro on the train as in the area, and they had had a few drinks too many and lost contact with each other in the crowded bar. His friend was found later in the city centre drunk and disorientated, so the Police took him into a cell for the night. His briefcase had been found with Paul, with the phone on top and that is when the Police realised the tragic connection and had to break the bad news to him that his best mate since childhood had gone. That lad feels guilty still that had he not arranged to meet Paul that night, he might still be alive, he wouldn't have gone out by the river and been drinking.
It is so sad that yet again a young life has gone.
I am still in touch with Paul's parents, they send me a card every Christmas and cards when they travel America, visiting all the places Paul visited on his gap year and staying with the people Paul stayed with. Paul's Mum's birthday is on the 7th February. I often wonder if he had already put her card in the post before his life ended that night.

Lizx

(¯`*•.¸JUPITER JOY AND HER CRYSTAL BALLS(¯`*•.¸

(¯`*•.¸JUPITER JOY AND HER CRYSTAL BALLS(¯`*•.¸ Report 10 Feb 2008 23:40

so very sad hun,thoughts and prayers for his family.xxx

Susan719813

Susan719813 Report 10 Feb 2008 23:43

That is so sad Liz,

Thoughts go out to the parents.

Susan
x

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond Report 10 Feb 2008 23:47

Hi Susan, Hi Joy, Paul's parents are such lovely people, they try hard to go on as best they can. Their daughter is close to them but doesn't live at home, but they must miss Paul so much. I have never dared ask but can only think what it was like if that birthday card arrived the following day, maybe in the same post as sympathy cards.

The young Norwich lad's Mum was on tv last week appealing for anyone who knew anything to come forward. It must be awful for the parents of who ever that body belongs to, to know their loved one has been in the cold river for so long.
Lizx

CATHKIN

CATHKIN Report 10 Feb 2008 23:50

There have been a couple of drownings like this in River Clyde in Glasgow --so , so sad for the families,
Ros xx

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond Report 10 Feb 2008 23:52

Ros, it is awful, isn't it? Such a waste of a life, all for a couple of bottles of booze or a pint too many.
Lizx

~Summer Scribe~

~Summer Scribe~ Report 10 Feb 2008 23:59

It never ceases to amaze me that councils think it's ok to have pubs/clubs right by the water. I'm surprised there haven't been any fatalities since they opened our floating nightclub. There are sufficient barriers but people do lose their sense of danger when drunk and also balance and judgement can be so impaired.

My best friend from school lost her fiance after he took a dare to swim out to the little island on the reservoir near our home (next door to a pub). Such a pointless loss.

Two tragic loses highlighted (and possibly many more), even if the body isn't that of the missing young man, it's still someone who has become another victim of the river. It must be so hard not to know what happened. I admire you for your campaigning, Liz. Obviously the measures installed still aren't adequate. So tragic.

Lyndi

Lyndi Report 11 Feb 2008 00:13

Always so sad when you hear of a young life being lost.
I think it said on local teletext they would be identifying tomorrow (Monday) Liz.
My heart goes out to the family of the young man.
And well done to you Liz on the campaign to improve safety measures around that area.
I remember reading about it all in the newspapers.

xx

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond Report 11 Feb 2008 04:01

Thanks Lynda, I got very angry about it all. I know if it hadn't been too prohibitively expensive the family would have sued the council for corporate negligence or whatever it is called. Not for the money, for the principle and the lesson to be learned. The Council commissioned a Rospa report and paid for it then ignored most of what was advised. Ludicrous!
If Bill Armstrong is the Coroner in charge of this latest lad's inquest, I am sure he will have plenty to say about the loss of another young life. He did something he has never done before,appparently, when, after Paul's inquest, he got the Clerk of the Court to fetch me in to speak to him about the safety campaign.
There is an SOS boat to help with river rescues and it is paid for by charity donations and Paul's family sent £800 from collections made at his funeral, towards the costs of keeping it on the river. It was mainly Fridays and Saturdays tho and would you believe it, vandals damaged it where it was moored up, so they had to keep it further from the city, defeating the object really. I think it is back in the city now, but they can only help if an accident is reported or noticed on any cctv cameras and the river winds its way through many routes out of the clubbing area so not every where has cctv or has other people walking about at the same time. Also if householders hear shouts or screams, it is often ignored because of the many noisy revellers going past at all hours, shouting unnecessarily.
The walk along the river is lovely in nice weather and daylight, but can be a cold, dark, menacing, lonely place late at night.
Lizx

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond Report 11 Feb 2008 14:50

Sad to say that the body found was confirmed as young Gary's.

He was a much loved son, in work, popular with friends, why him?

Why not one of those of the ilk of the people who beat Garry Newlove to death, how come those sort of morons sail through life?

No justice in this world.
Rest in Peace, young Gary and Garry Newlove too.

Lizx