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Hi
I was adopted at birth, I had a great upbringing with all the love & stability anyone could be expected to give. However, my birth family were never far from my thoughts even though I never knew them (I was only 6 weeks old when I went to my adopted family).

I'm certain Aaliyah will return one day, it's taken me 43 years to begin my search but now I've started I can't stop. I just want you all to know the children are thinking of you too. Don't give up hope.

The box is a great idea, I'd suggest you include things about yourselves, not just thoughts of the missing child, I want to know what my family have been doing and what my connections are, where do I get my talents from? etc.

Best wishes to you all.

Nicola Jane,

That is SUCH good advice!!

Looked at from the other point of view it is very helpful.

I have saved newspapers from the day my grand-daughter was born, and made notes of her progress BUT, I never thought to put in details of what WE were doing !

Looking at it now, that is exactly what she would want - details of us, NOT her !!

Put this in your box or diary !!
Thank you for the tip.

Dea x

Let's hope Linda comes back to this thread and reads Nicola Jane's post!!

Hi Nicola Jane,

Thankyou for the post, it has been nice to hear from someone who is on the other side of the coin and your suggestions are very much welcomed as I had not thought of all the things Aaliyah might want to know.

I hope that anyone else who reads this thread, that may be in the same position will find it useful.
I wish you all the very best of luck in your search Nicola and a great big Thankyou to you and everyone X

Hi msk,

Nicola Jane hs given some VERY useful advice - from the other side!!

Let's hope you connect one day and it will prove worthwhile!!

Dea x

Hi all

have had some brilliant news this morning -
managed to locate my d-in-l's mum!
spoken on the phone - she is going to meet me in a couple of weeks - with the little one!
she thinks it's disgraceful that my d-in-l hasn't let us see him.
so stick with it! hope we all have happy endings

Love Christine x

Hi Christine,

I am really pleased for you, hope everything goes well and you manage to sort out a regular visits with your little grandson.

If only everyone could put aside the adults feelings and do what is right for the children !!

best wishes
Linda

Hi

Another thought, put something in the box anytime you think of the child. I'd be amazed if I wasn't in my mothers thoughts on my birthday & at Christmas. What would be really special would be to know you thought of us on random days just because we are important. Hope that makes sense?
On a more parctical level rather than buying birthday / christmas cards & or presents, I'd suggest you save the cash somewhere, money box or jar or even a bank account. Call it the "reunion celebration fund" hopefully you will only have enough for a Macdonalds as the reunion will be soon, if however, your lost children are like me & wait 40 odd years before looking, imagine how great it'd be.
I hope that doesn't come across as mercenary. We who start to search do so with very low expectations, it's certainly not for material gain. I just think if I find my family a box of presents would be very much appreciated for the thoughts, but a glass of champagne for us all......hopefully you understand my point.

Good luck

Hi Nicola,

Thanks for the suggestions, We are already doing some of the things you have mentioned, and with the price of driving lessons, car, insurance etc I would expect it to come very useful.

Thanks again for your input as always it is very much appreciated. x

Hi
I waited 40+ years to begin my search & thanks to this site made contact with my sister within a week!!
In 1965 I was adopted out, being a secret baby of unwed teenager, how low were my expectations???

Instead I am there in black & white on my birth family tree!! Having purchased 50 search credits I've found everyone & still have 43 credits remaining!! I hope to speak with my birth mother soon, she is in a state of shock at the moment, not least because she's just discovered, aged 63 she has two great grandchildren!

My advice to you all is stick with this site, keep your email address current. If you do that your loved ones will find you within days of commencing the search.

Good luck & best wishes.

Oh Nicola - I am so happy for you - I do hope your meeting with your mother is a good one - I'm sure it will be - she must be both nervous and excited too - I know I would be!!

Ann XXX

My very best wishes too!!!!!!!! - to all of you! - those who have 'connected' and those of you who are still longing to 'connect'.

I hope one day you will all get what you wish for.

Dea x

Congratulations Nicola, I am pleased this site enabled you to find your family and that the meeting with your mum goes really well, we can only imagine the choices women had to make in the past with all the predjudices etc that were around at the time.

Best wishes

Linda