General Chat

ad is a good idea maybe nxt week.thanks

Hi Again,

Just wanted to wish you all the best with the operation, try and concentrate on your recovery for now, after this, there may be a few things you can do about your BF.
Try contacting SS in your area to see if they hold any files relating your time in the children's home, fingers crossed they can at least confirm the info you have now.
But try to put this on a back burner for a little while, to give you time to recover. :O)

Take Care
Sheila

I don't know if this would be any help at all, but it just occured to me , I am assuming from the name that your father was Irish, Irish descent....have you thought of putting an advert in the 'Irish Post' published over here with a good readership in London......maybe if you put a 'trying to find' ad either he, or someone he worked for might remember.
Worth a try maybe?

Very good luck for your op'

Rosex

Wishing you all the best, please let us know how the op goes.

Thinking of you tomorrow-keep smiling xx

I forgot my imaginary father was supposed to have been 16 when I was born so he would be about 56, 57 now ,she blurted out once she should have known better than to get involved with someone 2 yrs younger than her and she was 18 when I was born.

thanks I'm really scared,it doesn't seem real,I know I will make an idiot of myself cry all day.X

best of luck for tomorrow xx

Thank you to everyone who has replied,and who have sent me mail the response is overwhelming.
It is a strange situation,but all of the info I have is unreliable except my date and place of birth and my mothers name which I am not free to disclose.I don't even know if my sister actually has the same father as me, she could just be saying that to appear respectable.I know me and my sister were left in a children's home for 2 years between 1969 and 1972 but I don't know which one and my mother wouldn't have told me about except the memory was so clear and traumatic, I have never forgotten it so she can't deny it.I clearly remember her coming to take us home with Bob her new Husband,when I was 4.

Hi caroline sincerely hope the op goes well for you, and that you have the best of luck with finding who you are looking for. xx

Caroline have pm'd you with some info, but Sheila is right, you need to make sure your info is correct....although difficult going by what you have said....have you got an age for him, year even?

Hi,

I agree with you Caroline, being adopted myself I can understand your need to know, the main problem you have is how reliable your info is, given what you have said about your mother, your also working with a pretty common name, can anyone else help apart from your mother ? are there any ideas about where he may have gone to from an Aunt or Uncle ? Shirley and I can help with look ups, but in order to try and trace him you would need more precise info:O( unless you try and trace the guys in London.
Maybe Joan Allen could help, as a last resort there is Traceline if you have his d.o.b but they do charge so leave that for now.

Sheila

By the way my mother wasn't married,I cant put her name on here because I wouldn't get her permission in fact she would have a fit if she knew I was even looking,which I think is very cruel everyone has a right to know where they come from,even if they don't like what they find.I don't care if he is an absolute swine at least I would know.
I could probably cope if I never find out but my sister breaks her heart crying all the time because she needs to know so badly.

Shelia ...I,m coming up with the same stuff...but cant for love of me find a marriage!!??

hi lisa how are you?

very good luck we willall be thinking of you x

Hi Caroline,

Just had another look there are 35 Patrick J Macdonagh in the uk 5 of these are in London should I send you the list, I can check which ones seem married if you like, so you know how to approach them.
I have had thyroid problems most of my adult life and know the link to birth family, although funny enough it seems to be one of the few things my BM does now seem to have ;O) my friend had the same operation as you a few years ago, with no problems, and has felt brilliant ever since, so try not to worry too much.

Sheila

thank you all for your replies.The name on the birth certificate is Patrick Joseph Mcdonagh,residence Hammersmith,London
My situation is complicated,I am now estranged from my mother who I have sadly come to realise is a fantasist and a habitual liar.
All the time I was growing up I was told that my father was called James,but when I applied for my birth certificate the name was Patrick Joseph McDonagh.that was the first I knew about it.
She has constantly told us that he was an alcoholic who took his wages and dissapeared when I was 2,but now I don't believe this anymore.
She let slip that he was 16 when I was born, but on my birth certificate it say mechanical engineer which is impossible at 16.I have watched her lie and manipulate people my whole life except when I was left with other people(which was a lot)I have now decided I don't have the energy for a relationship with a her anymore.I have been lied to my whole life and denied access to my family on both sides so I know she is hiding something.
I also know she is capable of just making a name up and persuading someone to impersonate her partner,my only hope is if someone is looking for me as all I have is a name nothing else.
thanks again for all your replies,its nice that so many people are willing to help.
Its thyroid cancer by the way which is usually hereditary but I have no history to go on,it makes me feel very lonely.

Hi Caroline,

Best of luck with the surgery on Monday, ....have you nothing else to go on reg Patrick on the 2003 ele roll there are 153 people with that name in the UK alone, no middle initial or area ?

Sheila

Hope things go well for you on Monday Caroline.

I am sending positive thoughts for a quick and complete recovery.

Jean x.