General Chat

Elaine, I totally agree with you, naming complainers would achieve nothing but cause more aggro. Jim, I totally agree with you also - remove the offensive comments, not the entire thread, which effectively offends everyone who has contributed to the thread and always spawns a whole pile of new, antagonistic threads. Bev

Well said Jim - it's the odd comments that cause the problem, rather than the theme of the threads. However, 'odd comments' can be ignored I think by any adult thinker (and perhaps you're thinking of ignoring this - lol). I still believe that if an individual has the right to complain, then the person/persons who is/are the subject of that complaint have the right to know who is complaining about them, and perhaps more importantly why. If we went through life having our thoughts and opinions (freely expressed) deleted at the whim of anyone else, we would be in an awful state - and, dare I say it? - at the mercy of those who deem their views to be superior to others (now that's an 'odd comment' lol). That is NOT a pop at anyone, but my opinion. Jacqui

Unfortunately GR have a habit of removing the whole thread, which sometimes has a good discussion going, because some idiot has put in a deliberately provocative and inflammatory comment. I would prefer to see the offensive COMMENTS removed rather than the whole thread. It is a pity they cannot target the troublemakers and stop them from causing the problems.

i completley agree with Jacqui, if we all excercised more common courtesy to each other and not go behind peoples backs then perhaps there would be less misunderstanding on here and with less secrecy there would be less paranoia, i have always been a beliver of what i cant say to your face i would not say behind your back and i would hope that other members on here would show me the same courtesy

Well I think we're in agreement for once Elaine!

Not once have I said that I dont respect others opinions on here I know what would happen if we posted a thread or added a comment to a thread every time we complained. People would dissagree...and some would agree....people would be accused of all sorts......and here we go again....another row has erupted.......back to square one !. Thats why GR have a system, and why it should be used....without the need for people to admit they have used it. If I have a posting removed, I assume Gr has decided that it was innapropriate, either because of complaint or by themselves looking in. What good will it do having the complainers name plastered all over the board? Will I want to thank them ? Will I be angry with them if i feel there was nothing wrong with my thread? Will I have a go at them starting another row? makes you think Elaine x ( by the way , im not arguing with anyone on this thread, im just expressing my opinion)

I don't think there are many people on here who would want to be named for having a thread removed. Just imagine the repercussions! Everyone should have the right to complain to GR in private and then make their own decission as to whether they want to own up to it. At the end of the day GR alone make the decission as to whether a thread should be removed and there's really nothing we can do about it. For the record in my 2 years as a member I have asked for 3 threads to be removed and owned up to each one of them - but I respect the right of other members to remain anonymous if they so wish. Jeanette x

If that is your opinion, then Elaine as adults we all will respect it. But you too must also respect the opinions of others of us on here, in that we do not see it unreasonable to know who is complaining about particular threads (and if possible the reasons why). I would have thought that it would make an interesting debate. I do understand however if you have e-mailed people and asked that threads etc be deleted and they have ignored you - these people are not 'adults' in my estimation, and they too should'stand up and be counted'. Jacqui

Just to clarify I dont complain about an individual or their threads or comments because I dislike them, I will complain if I feel someone is being unfairly treated by another member, friend or foe they may be. If I think that something upsets me that is written, which i feel is offensive to myself or other members. In the past I have mailed people to ask for the removal of material or comments, and either have been rudly answered or ignored (in most cases) If I want to complain, I will do so through gr. The correct channel for complaint, and will NOT answer to the board or its judges for my reasons for doing so. I quote :- Important Note: Please do not post anything here which may offend, infringe anyone's rights, or breach the law. If you see anything here that may do so, then please inform us of it using the Contact Us page. We do not generally monitor contributions before they appear here, so we rely upon users to help eliminate offending material.

Elaine - I'm not intimating that there are 'gangs' on here or anything like. What I am saying is that if someone has a legitimate complaint (and it matters not WHO that person is, whether they are regular contributors to the boards or not) then they should 'stand up and be counted', put forward their complaint in public, and sort the matter out, as adults and with the name (not remain anonymous - which in itself leads to rumour and speculation) You and I have 'crossed swords' before if I remember, but I like to think that neither of us had to resort to 'complaining' to GR about our differences of opinion. We sorted it as the adults we are, in public. I do try always to look at both sides of an arguement or discussion and as I said before, if someone disagrees with my views or my opinion they are free to say so. If the matter upsets them so strongly then they are also free to say so, and either contact me directly or say they are considering complaining to GR. That way the originator of a thread can then make a considered decision whether to delete the thread or not, and if the decision is not to delete the thread then GR can make the final decision (but only after due and long consideration). I just feel that the deletion of threads on here by GR is sometime not considered deeply enough; they are busy people by their own admission, and cannot possibly devote enough time to determine whether complaints are legitimate or merely malicious. Jacqui

I agree with Jan and David, it is not the complaining,that is a right. Its the underhandednes of the complaint and, the annonymity that gets me. If you have a problem with me.....fine, but speak TO me not ABOUT me. I do not agree with you Elaine. I think GR do not REALLY read the threads. I think it may be an attempt to keep the peace. AND, its not working. Deanna

do you think we should have an arguments board ? i know i am making light of a bad situation but if we did then the thread could stay as it was and the people in disagreement could fight it out on the argument board, and i wonder which board people would read most? i think i could hazard a guess lol. tina (no offence meant to anyone)

If I complain, its MY business and nothing to do with anyone else. I will not have to answer to anyone by placing my name on any thread to say what I have done. People just dont always complain to get up the nose of an origionater of a thread. Many complain for a reason, and as many reasons are outlined in the message board rules, thats why many threads are taken off. Plus gr does NOT take off threads for no reason. If there are no grounds for a removal of a thread, then it is NOT taken off. Elaine x

Elaine I'm not sure who you're addressing but I think most of us are quite aware of how many people read the boards and how many members GR has. What some of us are saying is that we are quite happy to put our names on a thread stating that we object, rather than going running to GR. If I have a problem with something I'm more than happy for people to know I have and I don't worry about people having a go at me or sending me so-called abusive messages. I posted a thread last week in which I said that it bugged me that people have these conspiracy theories - apparently it was deleted after someone pointed out I mentioned David Bennett (sin of sins). Some people do have more friends than others - you only have to see people jumping on certain bandwagons when there are disagreements - but I don't think GR are likely to take much notice of that!

What people fail to realise is, There are more people who look in (full members I mean) on these boards, and maybe rarely add to posts. As GR have a few MILLION members, each full member has the right to question a thread, or ask for its removal. It more and likely is not down to a FEW members who ALWAYS complain (who knows WHO complains...why only a group of individuals suspected of any wrong doing? ) There are NO groups....gangs...cliques...or whatever you choose to call them on the boards, grouping up with the sole aim to complain about peoples threads. Many of us have had one or more threads of ours deleted. Some because of complaints some because arguments are starting some because they can add fuel to an already raging fire. As said before there are more members on here than we converse with on here each day. Just put the boot on the other foot for a moment Would you like YOUR name put on the board for all to see each time you complain? So that people can jump on you for having their thread removed for whatever reason. To be slated on the boards? For a row to start ? Because that is what would happen And that is why GR will not do it ! Elaine x

Here, here David and Jacqui, I totally agree with your comments. It's a great pity that so many threads do disappear. When the majority think they're having a proper discussion on a topic and suddenly, without warning, it's gone and no-one is ever told the reason why. I cannot imagine that any sensible person would not consider removing a thread that genuinely upset someone, if that person approached them privately. The problems are caused, as you say, when things are done underhandedly that's what causes such furore. Jan

I agree David. If a person has a legitimate complaint, then post a thread saying that they have, and are considering complaining about it; the person generating the thread then has the option of replying privately if they want and the parties can sort the matter out as adults. If anyone objects to my views then they are at liberty to say so, and I wont complain either on the board or to GR but would be happy to talk with anyone who feels I have stepped out of line. If I have a complaint about a particular thread (which fortunately has never really happened as I take the view that I can switch threads if I dont like the content) then I will do just as I say above - post a thread saying I may complain to GR, and then take the matter up with the originator of the thread. I do not like anonymous complainers, and feel that if they feel so strongly about an issue they should perhaps stand up and be counted. Jacqui

I think people do far too much complaining - I've been on the site two years and have found many things offensive in that time but have only complained once - that was because of what I saw as the unfair treatment of one person by several others. When I did complain I posted on the thread to say I was doing so which I think is the right way to do things. I don't approve of anonymous complaints and the circumstances where it would be too personal for someone to voice their complaint are rare - often it's just people being cowardly and snidey. If I object to something I believe what I'm saying and am proud to voice it. We are all supposed to be adults and we have the choice to avoid a thread we don't like or to join in the discussion/ argument.

I would never put anything on here to diliberatly hurt or injure anyones feelings or just to be controvesial, but i would hope that if i did inadvertantly upset someone then i hope that they would do me the courteseyof giving me a polite reason for asking for a thread of mine to be deleted, and then if a compromise coudnt be reached both parites could put their case to Genes to be judged on its merit, all this underhand stuff just causes more trouble

elaine can i ask your opinion.would you complain about another member asking about another member when they haven't seen them for a while.the explanation which was given to me is that a member foud it offensive.wheres the offence.would like your view on that.love and hugsxxxxx(: