General Chat

A very emotive subject but a good one to discuss! My own view is less to do with the fear that playing with guns will make someone disturbed enough to kill someone or not but more this - I never allowed my children to play with realistic looking guns as guns are not toys. If they made them out of other things or played with water pistols, that was fine, it was their imaginations at work, but ultimately, guns are not toys and owning them is a serious business, needing licenses and proper training. It's illegal to own them in some cases and that's another issue. Having said that, when my children were old enough and wanted an air rifle, they had one and used it under supervision. In the USA it is part of the constitution that the population can bear arms, and politically, I believe that adults should exercise that right. When only the police and the government can carry arms, a country is well on the way to becoming a police state and government has too much power. An armed population is one way that the Founding Fathers saw of keeping government in check. But that's another topic for another conversation!! Should children play with guns, real or realistic? No! Should we worry if they play with weapons that they have made for themselves? No!

Playing with guns, working with tools, handling potentially dangerous objects, is all part of growing up and learning to take responsibility. We all play at driving a car as a child. Later we learn to do it properly (hopefully). We do not take our pretend crashes and mad chases into real life. I have shot on a range, but have no desire to go out and commit a massacre. More murders and wounding is done by knives than guns. Are we fashioning a society where it is not necessary to take personal responsibility because all means to do harm has been removed from the private citizen and is reserved for the State? Drop litter: don't worry, the road-sweeper will pick it up. Drop your used chewing gum: don't worry, the cleaner will deal with it. Have a teenage pregnancy: don't worry, you'll be OK on benefits. OK, there has to be services and a safety net, but many people seem to think they can live life without responsibility for both small and large issues.

Mags we are a Quaker fsmily and as such are pacifist.When our five sons were growning up we did not buy guns for them or any other toys related to violence.The boys just went out into the garden and found twigs with bends in them and made guns. Children work life out for themselves.None of our boys has grown into a thug because he played Cowboys and Indians with his brothers.They are all loving parents with lovely wives.I don't think children are particu;arly influenced by their games.I do think that modern children may be inurred to violence because they see so much of it on television ,and they may not realise that people really do get seriously hurt. With the right guidance from parents,they grow up OK.-ROSE

Hmm this one will throw you comming from a mum ..... I have a gun and go shooting, so does my hubby and so does our 14 year old son ! My boys were allowed to have toy guns, they knew the difference between fact and fiction as they were educated accordingly. They play computer games but have no desire to go out and be violent, mug old ladies or shoot people or animals. In the last two years we have become involved in the clay target shooting scene, and discovered our youngest son is naturally an extremely good shot. Last year he won 3 cups representing our county at different disciplines. Actually using a real shotgun has taught him strict safety and discipline. He has a healthy respect for the damage they can cause and so he still has no desire to go out and maim anyone. For me it comes down to nurture. XX Sioux

Chris, you are now starting on the nature or nurture theme! I think that nurture plays a very big part in the upbringing of a child. Well done you for having such a well balanced child!!

Lindy, How awful that memory must be for you. Your Dad brought you up well and you respected his wishes. I am worried for the children that do not have a leveling influencs in their lives.

Hi I haven't allowed the boys to play with guns in our house. When my uncle died last week & I was explaining to my 6 year old he asked 'was he shot?' Even when you don't allow it at home they still pick it up from tv or films or school!! Penny

Laura, Yes it says they are ok and we should allow. I suppose why I can not have a balanced view of this is because I used to work for Post Office Counters many moons ago and I have had a sawn off shot gun pointed at me and seen a guy shot. I don't think about it much , but this article made me think and I realised that I ban guns, I will not have them, whether they be toy guns, pieces of twig, or lego. I need some input, which I have got from you guys and you have all been fantastic.

Mags, I do not see anything wrong with children, boys or girls, playing with toy guns. I did and so did my own children. My late Dad was in the Police Force and had a rifle and a side arm. We were warned never to touch them and we never did. However, having said that, it brings back childhood memories of two young brothers playing cops and robbers and one of them went to fetch their Dad's gun and shot his brother dead. So very sad. Lindy

Toy guns yes, as long as they weren't too realistic. I played with guns when I was little, if you bring children up properly they won't use real guns when they are older even if they have used toy guns. Real guns no AL

Hi Mags, no I havent does it reccomend it?

The most important years for me are between the ages 5-8 Children develop a greater social awareness at this age. They understand the basic rights of others when taught fairness, values and the need to follow certain rules of behavior. Give them lots of praise when it's due. Children of this age respond well to simple reasoning and explanations. Concepts such as truthfulness and generosity can be introduced. Continue to set an example of acceptable behavior. The child at this stage wants to please you and wants to be liked by others. Davex

Laura, have you read the article in (don't know whether I'm allowed to do this , but here goes!!!!) Professional Child Care May 2005. This is where this all started.

I work with young children and we are told that its fine and they'll grow out of it. Not sure I agree though-there are lots of toys that dont make killing a game.

Isn,t there something about forbidden fruits? happy days

A member of Parliament who speaks sense! Does the Right Whatever, have a way we can teach right from wrong without seeming like a right spoil sport?

Paul, couldn't agree more. We all endured sports days so why not our children? Competition is good. Children should not be wrapped in cotton wool, they need to know what the real world is about. I am most strict about table manners, but I am worried that this might be teaching the children.. Please may I leave the table, because I wish to shoot that guy over there!

Paul - You are not wrong!

I dont see anything wrong with little boys being allowed to play with toy guns we always did. The main thing they should be told is it only playing and the real thing is a crime. Dave

it goes deeper, its like this thing of not having winners at sports days in case it upsets the losers, pathetic. how are we expected to produce quality winners if we are treating our children with big fluffy love? films and tv are more violent than ever, and yet we try to take the pacifist route with our children. we have double standards all over the place.