General Chat

Hi Susan, I haven't any advice, but you have my sympathy, bug hugs, and prayers that you will keep strong for your Mum and your Dad. It's hard watching our parents age and especially hard as we see them get ill, the two people who were always our invincible leaders.... My Dad's been ill for the past year - in and out of hospital, test after test, and a mountain of medication....I can't believe how much this has affected my Mum, the person I always saw as the strongest in the family. They're both approaching 80, and it isn't going to get easier. I have seen such huge changes in them both during this past year. I live overseas, but have spent more time with them this last year than I probably have in the last 10. All we can do is stay strong for them. I guess it's nature's way of telling us that's its now our turn to be a rock for them to lean on. Thinking of you and sending positive thoughts...... (((((((((hugs))))))))) Karen x

susan all i can say is i send you a hug, its a cruel thing when t his happens to someone, have a girl i work with, she had a right year of it, she diagnosed with breast cancer, thats been caught in time, while shes been coping with helping her inlaws, as her mother in law is suffering alzheimers, i feel for you i really do, give your mum a hug too, hope you can get comfort from the bits in between when your dad will have the good days, thinking of you

Susan So sad for you all, sending you a (hug) as i know just how heartbreaking this can be. Thinking of you all. Yvette

susan the people on here are fantastic and so supportive,arent they? i wouldnt have got through the last 5 weeks if it wasnt for the support i have had on here. stay strong for your mum .sadly your dad wont realise that anything is wrong with him,its always the family that suffer in dementia cases. love to you and your family. susie xxx

You are all wonderful. I knew that before, but the outpouring of love and support through replies and PM's is incredible. Thank you so much all of you and I will also think of you who are going through or have gone through a similar experience. Being the eldest I often feel responsible for my Mum, brother and sister. Well, my brother said to me yesterday, 'who put you in charge? We all pull together, no-one takes this on alone'. I felt so much better. We all have supportive spouses, but in a case like this you seem to need to your siblings to get through this and support Mum. Thank you all again. Love Susan xxx

I used to work with people with dementia, and I used to find that the relatives suffered the most, I know this sounds silly, but their feelings for the person suffering and their desire to do everything for the loved one made it even more difficult for them, and since with some authoritys help is not easily forthcoming, its after all much cheaper if the sufferer stays at home and is cared for by the family, I know this sounds awful but it is I am afraid, true....it is very necessary to consider the welfare of mum and dad because she will not be able to, and if necessary fight like a tiger for both of them.......my love and good wishes go with all of you....Barbara.............

It's such a cruel, cruel illness, and one that helped to take my beloved maternal Nan. One of the most intelligent people I've ever known. I really feel for you and your family Susan, and can understand a bit of how helpless you must be feeling. Mercifully, my Grandad had died a few years before Nan (it would have broken his heart); it was his funeral that set the wheels in motion for Nan's decline. Huge hugs for your poor Mum, and hugs for you all, Glenys x

thoughts and prayers Susan, for you and your mum, hope you can get thru these troubles with love and guideance. Deb

No Susan it isn't going to get better, all you can do is give your dad the support and love he needs be there for him............