General Chat

when I was 11 I got sent to my room for saying blast. My Mother never ever swore, she didn't even say damn and wouldn't say blimey because to her it meant 'God blind me'. So I grew up not swearing, then I went out to work and started occasionally to swear if stressed but not very often,never swore when the children were around. I worked in a large secondary school lunch times running a disco where the language was pretty bad and I used to tell them to stop and listen to themselves, couldn't they express themselves without swearing etc (in the 70s) Then I went to work for the military!!!! swearing was general language there, although it was toned down to b****y, b****r, s*** etc, no really bad 4 letter words in front of we 'ladies'. So my language expanded to include the above swear words . And I do swear under pressure or for emphasis when annoyed. But I have never and would never use the F or C words and neither does Tony. On the boards I use Lol! because we don't have emoticons and I want people to know when somthing i say is light hearted. I don't use PMSL because i wouldn't say that in real life, it is not me. But I accept it on here and it doesn't bother me. Sorry a bit long winded. ann Glos

I do swear but only when appropriate ie either hurting myself or trying to emphasize a point. I see nothing wrong in swearing, I do not class it as an act of low intelligence as very few other words have the right emphasis. Having 3 small children, I do not swear in front of them or other children. I learnt my lesson after calling some person who was driving badly as t*ss**r and my 18 mth yr old repeated it. I have adapted my language and my favourite swear word is now SAKE! dropping any preceding expletive I may have used before motherhood. I believe that swearing is okay for people who are bright enough to make the distinction between when it's appropriate or not. Sadly there are fewer and fewer people making that classification. I will add pmsl or lmao in a post because it seems acceptable language on this board and in some circumstances I would use the phrase in conversation. Dianna x

When I was growing up swearing wasn't considered dreadful in my house. I don't ever say the 'c' word, but when I do swear, it's usually used to emphasise something and in good humour. I don't swear when talking to strangers, friends and family who don't swear, and when I do swear it's usually no more severe than 'bl**dy'. If I say worse, I'm either very mad or have hurt myself. I've never sworn at someone, and would be upset if someone swore at me with the sole use of offending me. I don't think the words are offensive, but the way in which they can be said.

Hi Maureen I think television does have some influence on what we say, especially some of the reality programmes that are shown I also think that some of the 'role models' for our youngsters have a lot to answer for, but then the pop/sport personalities of my generation also had an influence on behaviour, so that is not necessarily a recent thing ;-))

I have never sworn and neither did my parents or my children...!

I am more upset if my daughter swears than my sons { the teens that is} she is doing it a lot as her peers all do and I hate it! I do admit to swearing but only when really mad, cazxxxx

The swearing has to be taken in context. What you say to the sewing machine, lawn mower, computer or less liked relations may not be appropriate to say to/or even let be heard by your kids teacher, your kids, your boss or your more adored relations. yvette x

Dont you think its the same as sex and violence I ts on the tv all the time Which make yougsters think its the norm or run of the mill If its on tv must be ok Please bring back Mary Whitehouse Maureen

Hi Gilly I have nudged up the Board abbreviations thread for you, it might give you an idea of what some of us are on about when we go into 'text' speak ;-)))))

Bless you Gilly. A friend a few years back kept typing LOL at the end of every sentence and it use to bug me what it meant until he told me. Im not too bad now. Yvonne x

Peeing myself laughing.

I must admit I do swear to a degree but only with close friends, otherwise I usually watch my P's and Q's around different people and never swear in front of children. My OH hates women who swear although hes heard me a few times LOL. Well sometimes he makes you swear. There are certain words which I find disgusting and would never use.

Kaye and OC I tend to agree that we often adjust our language to fit in with the group we happen to be with at the time. That applies not only with swearing though. It is a case of using appropriate language for the situation you are in. At the end of the day we want to be accepted by the group we are with at any one time, so adapt accordingly. ;-))

I'm much the same as OC - it depends who I'm around. My Mother has always been very strict about swearing and is offended by it, therefore I don't swear in front of her - unless it's the odd teasing word, but never anything as strong as the 'f' word or the horrible 'c' word. I also agree about swearing around children - it makes me cringe to hear young kids swearing at each other. It's a subject I disagree with my Husband on - he has a 12 year old Son and has always used swear words in front of him, I think it's wrong and will tell him off if I hear him doing it. However, his Son does know not to use those words himself and would get a pretty stiff telling off from his Dad if he did - double standards really. I think some words are more acceptable than others though and often it's the tone and context in which they're used - like someone else said calling someone a 'daft B' in jest isn't the same as calling someone something much stronger in an angry tone. I'm not offended personally by people swearing, but do think that people who f and blind continually show a lack of intelligence - it may not be the case but that's how it looks. Having said that, if I was out for a drink with my Husbands family who all swear like troopers, then I would be much the same. lol Kaye x

For the first 40 years of my life I never said anything worse than damn. Then I went to work in catering. The language was unbelievably coarse and I spent my first week there in a constant blush. Now, I'm afraid, I swear a lot - but it depends where I am and who I am talking to. I wouldnt swear in front of strangers or indeed in front of anyone who doesnt swear themselves. This leaves me free to swear like a trooper with a few friends. It is not a lack of vocabulary that makes me swear, it is the peculiarly satisfactory emphasis you can put on certain words. I dont find the swear words offensive, it is the tone in which they are used which causes offence to me. All swear words have their roots in the english language and were once used in everyday conversations, not as swear words, but as descriptive adjectives. The F word, which causes such offence, is from the latin word fecit, which means 'to do' - what is offensive about that? Incidentally, I got my mouth washed out with soap as a child for saying Hell - its all relative, isnt it? OC

Interesting Lee that you say you were taught not to swear in front of women My late father in law was foreman in a factory just after the war. He regularly used bad language to the women on the shop floor, and explained his behaviour by saying it was the only language they understood.!!!!! He would never have dreamt of talking to his wife that way, and certainly would not have found it acceptable for anyone else to speak to her that way. Perhaps there is an unwritten code that men tone their language down in mixed company, but on the other hand some people seem to think that using bad language impresses people ;-))

Have to say Mags that when I was talking about swearing I wasn't thinking of the '*B*! hell' (for relief) or the 'daft *b.gger* (for fun) type of swearing. Not many of us haven't used them from time to time I'll wager. I was talking about what I call 'todays' swearing. The constant f,b and c words that seem to have become part of everyday life for some people. Chrissie x

I swear but not every time I open my mouth and never in front of children. Like others have said, find it appalling when parents eff and blind at their children. For me, it's not the lack of vocabulary that causes me to swear - it adds force. I feel so much better saying 'B* hell!' rather than 'Dear oh dear' and calling someone a 'daft b*gger' is part of my humour, I'm afraid. And many punchlines are made funnier by the odd expletive. (in my opinion) I find coarse language used constantly tedious rather than offensive and, yes, I do find it less acceptable in women. I shouldn't perhaps but I do. I don't use the eff word often - but do, yet the 'c' word is a no no as far as I'm concerned and I hate hearing it used. A self imposed double standard, I suppose. Mags xx

Sadly children learn their language skills from their parents. I tend to agree with Chrissie that the child doesn't need a slap, it is the mother that needs some kind of help. If the mother is swearing at the child out of anger and frustration then there may be other issues that need looking into If the mother uses that language as 'normal' then it shows a lack of vocabulary, and her child is likely to just pick up the words with no idea what they mean A friend, who is a social worker, once heard her child use a swear word. She explained to him exactly what it meant and said he could use the word only if he used it in its correct context Many days later a child used the word in the classroom, her child told the teacher exactly what the word meant, and she was called into the school and reprimanded for telling her child the meaning of the word!!! Strange world we live in Dee ;-)))

nudge