General Chat

yes i will keep strong i hope ... & now i know that all you wonderfull people are hear for me it helps me alot THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH you dont know what it means to me love Joycexx

I don't think you are being selfish Joyce, you just know what feels best for you.....and you should be at peace with the decision you have made.... Perhaps your family feel that at least by having the chemo, it shows outwardly that things are being done to help ....but you know your own mind........keep strong....x sally

its your choice. do what you feel is right the family will eventually understand. (read below). hope you make the right choice. my mum had breast cancer when i was 18mnths old (i'm now 25). the cancer came back a further 3 times. over the years she had everything from radium, to chemo to all sorts off tablets, they all workd at the time. however when the cancer spread to bone, nothing would help it so mum declined the chemo. at the time i thought she was being selfish, i was young and had a young son etc. but now, 3yrs after she died i can see why she declined it - it would have only helped her for a short time and she would still have been in pain etc.

Joyce I really wish that I could give you a real hug and make your decision easy for you. I doubt anyone could understand what you are going through because every persons dilema will be different according to their personal cicumstances. There is no wonder you are feeling low Much love Janetx

abit of both i told them i was getting abit weepy & angry with people not me at all love Joycexx

((((hugs)))) Joyce, they must have been earwigging and they are for hubby's benefit. Were you ware of being depressed or are they assuming you have to be because of the illness? But no chemo??? Ann Glos

Joyce as everyone else has said only you know what is right for you. Its not being selfish to put quality first. My darling sister passed away at 38 from the side effects of all the drugs that she had been on for her cancer. I have extreme admiration for you and would like to add like many others that we are here for you. ((((((((((((((((gentle hug)))))))))))))))))))))). love Lin xxx

Just want to give you a {{{{{HUG}}}}} Joyce, Talk things over with your consultant, see if the good outweighs the bad regarding the treatment, and then base your decision on the facts and on how you feel to which road you want to take. Maybe your consultant can advise you on a support group for you to join to help you through this. Elaine x

thanks to all of you wonderfull people love joycexx

Hi Joyce I had breast cancer when I was 28, im now 50, I had chemo and radiation and in a way Im glad I did, the only down side was the side effects and the fact that I would never have any children. What frightened me was cos I was so flat chested they told me it was 50/50 that the cancer could go to my chest, so I had the treatment. Had my breasts reconstructed in 2001 with silcone and never looked back. Its really down to you and how you feel about it, whatever you decide, stay strong, think positive and keep going girl! I'll be 100% behind you. A Big Big Hug to you. Love Yvonne xxxx

Joyce, you say your family dont understand you, I bet they do, all to well!We are all selfish when it comes to life or loss of it.And I know 1st hand, but they love you and dont want to loose you,neither do we at genes, all for our own selfish reasons,PLEASE keep a possitive state of mind, I really believe that it helps,We are all here 4 you, you know that. Love Jean(taff)xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Joyce, how brave you are. I think it is right that you decide for yourself rather than for others, if you feel quality not quantity of life then that is the way you should go. Have you tried writing a letter to your family giving your reasons for your decision? It might be easier than trying to discuss or explain in person, when everyone will be emotional and maybe interrupting with their own thoughts etc. Of course, they want you around for a long time, they love you, but that is for them, not you as if your quality of life is not good, then you will be unhappy and uncomfortable. Let's all keep thinking positive thoughts for you and others in your situation, and respect your strength of mind and determination. Liz x

You must do what is right for YOU. Understandably, your family want you around as long as possible, but it is your decision. Take care what ever you decide.xx

Hi Joyce whatever you decide we are all with you .You are not being selfish only you can m ake this desision ?? and your family should respect you for that.Keep your chin up lots of love Chrisxxxx

Hi, Joyce. First of all - no! You are not being selfish. No, perhaps the chemo won't help certain aspects of your predicament, but will it make you more comfortable? Do your lovely family know everything? At the risk of sounding patronising, you are truly a brave lady, facing this situation. Are you still able to eat food that you like, and drink your favourite drinks? Sending positive thoughts to you. x

Hi Joyce, Whatever you decide should be for you! Not what family members want, mum couldn't have chemo but did have radiation to help with the pain more than anything else, Whatever you decide I wish you all the strength in the world and the very very best of luck Lady of the Manor x

Joyce, my thoughts are with you and your family at this difficult time. No you are not selfish, its your body, and at the end of the day its your decision. Bless you. ((((Hugs))))

Hi Joyce - I don''t know if you''re interested in alternative therapies but I couldn''t help but think of this when I read your thread. Have you heard of ground apricot kernels?? They''re supposed to work against cancer & are supposed to work as a preventative measure & also when all else fails. I got my supply from a firm in England called Dayspring - tel 01483 418258. If you go ahead & order this make sure that you eat plenty of FRESH pineapple or papaya. You can google laetrile to learn more. Also Goji berries are very good for people with cancer. Love, Ails x

Joyce I understand what your saying, I myself have been through this, and I argued all the way about quality, my hubby thought I was very selfish as he thought I was giving up. Although time is no longer on my side at least I feel like a normal person then going through all the side affects that living with chemo give you. Stay strong and do what is in your head and heart, life is far to short!! Big hugs to you Janey xxxx

Hi Joyce Just wanted to give you big (((((((((((((((( Hugs )))))))))))))))))) Thinking about you Love Gaynor x