General Chat

Joan, It might be a bit daunting, but what you have to say is very important.
Remember that although the staff are aware of his medical needs, after a long and happy time together, you know your husband best, so in a way you will be speaking on his behalf with an awareness of his needs and yours in his on-going care.
Maybe in the quiet of your own home today, you could write a few key points, which you want them to consider or questions you need answering.

You don't come over as someone who is timid.
Your voice and opinions are valid and important, so stand your ground.
Will be thinking of you <3

A bitterly cold chill in the air today, but no actual frost on the grass or pavements, when I walked to school.
Definitely a day to try out my new thermal clothing.!
The birdbath was frozen though, but not thick ice. A pigeon took a look and flew to a tree branch in disgust at not getting it's usual drink.Within a minute or two it was back to see if anything had changed :-S before giving it up as a bad job.
At least there was no repeat of yesterday's snow dusting.

Joan, make sure you have primed your daughter with everything you want to say, then if you can't she can.

Sometimes the Occupational therapy team will do home visits prior to discharge to check to see what is needed, hopefully they will do that and see the problems for themselves.

Good luck with it all.

Joan, you must go but remember you have your daughter with you who can speak up for you if it gets a bit difficult.

They will be looking at if your home can be made into a suitable living space to accommodate all of hubby's needs. You have said already that the bathroom is upstairs and he cannot manage a bath. I'm guessing after asking you lots of questions etc, someone may well want to come and look at your house before any decisions are made.

At the end of the day, he probably cannot stay permanently in the cottage hospital?

So the choices will be either, certain adaptation's could be made to your home to accommodate him or sadly maybe he would have to go into a care home.

Either way, this will be a difficult meeting for you and daughter but together you can support the decisions together.

They may ask you about your own health etc to see if you are able to be hubby's carer so make sure you tell them what your own health issues are etc.

I wish you all the luck and hope for a solution that will be beneficial for hubby and yourself.

I have finally replied with 3 cards to friends and now up to date with all their news etc.

Still some of my "concocted" soup from yesterday which to be fair was very tasty. So I had 1 packet of bread mix in and just thrown that in the bread maker to have later on. Should be ready by 5.30 pm.

Still some frost beside the fences which wont defrost now as the sun has moved round. Think it will be another hard frost tonight as well.

Well I'm progressing swiftly through my list of jobs to do for the week so shall carry on for a bit and see how far I get but def not doing ironing this afternoon!!

Florence in the hebrides

Morning all...just

Crisp winter's day here. Bright and sunny but oh my a very heavy frost. The loch is frozen as no water moving. Think it's 2 degrees.

Daughter gone away til Friday so peace and quiet and a tidy house lol. I have several replies to do from xmas cards. A friend of mine, her hubby died several months ago and another isn't well so I need to write one of my handmade blank cards for each.

Got my appointments sorted. Optician 25 Jan, Bone man re organised for 26 Jan and then reorganised Breast screening 30 Jan. So end of month i shall be gallivanting for 3 days :-D :-D :-D

Put out some bread and bird seed today and the usual family of crows, seagulls, starling, blackbirds and pigeons descended in their hundreds fighting over the food! But then suddenly little Robbie was perched in my big black tub as daughter threw some seeds in there Haven't seen Robbie for ages so was a delight to see him again.The ground is so hard with frost, it makes it difficult for the birds to search for worms etc. But like a giant hoover, the food was all gone in minutes!

My Amaryllis plant is about to fully open. The tallest of 3 flowers and its bright red. They will look beautiful once the 3 are fully open.Never known a plant to grow so quick.

Estate agents just phoned to say, everything is bobbing along very well. Searches etc have all been done. My paperwork was sent Friday but no sure if brother has received it yet. The post is so slow. We don't seem to get any for days on end, def gone downhill these days.

Joan, I fully understand your position with your home. Traditional cottages like my old home have small rooms so really not easy to switch things around. Carers need room to move around the bed and as you said, a hospital bed is quite bigger than a normal single bed. Hubby is in the best place for now and being well looked after and that's what matters.

Hope you are keeping warm. I had the heating on from early afternoon until 9pm yesterday in the lounge as felt it really cold. But we will be in mid January next week so Spring will be following behind hopefully.

Hope all is well with anyone else looking in.
Take care when out and about, its very slippy.

Florence in the hebrides

Names, dad is in West Sussex but the person who lives with him was a good friend who has become his "unofficial carer". he doesn't claim carers allowance for him. he is also a lot younger at 67(dad is 87)

Dads very old school and doesn't like strangers coming to his flat and likes to keep all his affairs private.

But they said because he had someone living with him that could assist if necessary, he was allowed home .

It depends on the person's needs. My dad can still manage to bath himself, get dressed etc and make light meals. Whereas with Joan's hubby, he's not very mobile so his needs are far greater, It also depends on your home.

If all your bedrooms are upstairs and it's not possible to make a bedroom downstairs and your bathroom is upstairs, that would make it not very suitable for a person with mobility/other needs.

It's a very hard situation to be in with no easy solution.

Big hugs to Joan

<3

Florence in the hebrides

:-S Florence’s dad is in Kent and doesn’t he have a live in carer?

Florence, your mixed soup reminded me of the one night a week my dad ‘cooked’ the evening meal.
Two packets of dried soup (knorr probably)mixed together - I don’t think it mattered what flavour it was.

Oh dear Florence, what a disaster for your dad and for the person who owns the flat

I don’t know what the system in Scotland is, but here if someone is discharged from hospital, it would be with a care package free for the first six weeks. The carers come in three times a day to deal with the personal needs. After that it depends on your finances if you need to pay for continuing care. They come out and do a home assessment to see what is needed before the discharge.
It may be that even with that, you feel that you couldn’t cope, especially with problems during the night. Sadly in that case,you may need to look for a care home. It must be such a difficult time for you having to cope with such changes in your life <3 <3

Afternoon everyone looking in.

Same weather here AG and Joan, heavy frost, but bright and sunny but oh sooo cold brrr. The sun did melt the driveway fairly quickly but on the grass in the corners, it is still there. With the sun starting to go down, no doubt it will freeze again here tonight.

I heard down in Kent in Maidstone, they have snow!!! something we dont want.

Great news Linda on your offer being accepted and a higher one too. So hope this time all goes through for you.

Joan, its hard making a dinner for one. When my daughter was away over xmas, i made very little dinners just for myself but I still ate well. Tonight I have emptied 2 tins of "cheap soup" in a pan and added some black pepper, some herbs and tom puree. I found some naan bread lurking in the freezer so shall have that too.

No idea what the mixed soup will taste like but i think it will be ok.
Your hubby is in the best place and getting all his needs attended too which if he was at home would be very hard on you. At least you are able to visit frequently.

Spoke with dad last night and there has been a disaster!!! He discovered why the tv in his carers room wasnt working. It is because the storm had snapped the pole securing the sat dish in half but.....it crashed landed down onto the conservatory roof and fell through the glass. The downstairs is now a flat and the owner is out of the country.

Dad is the leaseholder so he's responsible for the buildings insurance anyway. Today he had 2 companies coming round to give a quote and he was going to phone Insurance company as well.

That conservatory was where I played as a child when my grandparents had the whole house and nothing ever fell on the roof except for the neighbours cat occasionally!

What next I ask myself as dad has enough to deal with with his health.

I have just put the heating on as starting to feel chilly with the sun now gone.

So stay cosy everyone

Florence in the hebrides

Perhaps it was worth the delay, then, Linda!
It's funny how things work out.

Beautiful bright sunshine and blue sky here today - but very cold. The garden is thick with white frost, and with the clear sky it will freeze again tonight.

We had an offer on the house this morning 10k more than we had accepted last time. It is the retired couple who have already completed their house sale down south, so have the money in the bank. They are currently living in the nearby town with their daughter, but want to move as quickly as possible, so maybe that isn’t working out :-D

We have suggested that they try to buy the searches and survey from the previous couple to speed things up, but that depends if their solicitor is willing to use them.
Anyway there is no chain to collapse this time as they have the money in the bank, so fingers crossed it goes through this time

Afternoon everyone looking in.

Ooh Linda sounds promising, ill keep my fingers crossed for you.

Some sun here today but low clouds and showery too. Just been tidying and rearranging the hall cupboard and getting rid of a surplus amount of boxes!!! i guess we kept some to send xmas parcels but there were at least 8 in the cupboard and now I reduced that to 2.

Neighbour coming in for coffee in awhile as I havent yet seen her this year but she works 5 days a week so looking forward to catching up with her. They went to Edinburgh for Hogmanay and really had a lovely time.

Just written my list of jobs to do for next week and its growing arms and legs by the day lol. One or 2 cousins I didnt get a card from which is concerning as one isnt well and the other has been unwell for some time. Sadly the other halves are not so quick to let me know if anything amiss but hopefully nothing drastically wrong. They may have stopped sending cards?

I have a couple of thankyou cards to send. My nephew bought me a lovely set of garden utensils and he looks forward to getting his own thankyou card, hes only 6 bless him.

Well hope all is ok with everyone else today.

Keep warm all

Florence in the hebrides

Well we had one house viewing yesterday and two this morning. The people from yesterday had seen it before. They were going to make an offer then, but lost their buyer, so couldn’t. They have just put theirs back on the market so aren’t any use until they get a buyer. Both lots this morning have already sold. One is in rental and one is living with their daughter. The second lot, I am quite hopeful about, but we will have to wait and see.

AG glad you are home safely. Yes get a hot shower and then pjs on and your dressing gown to warm up.

Glad your cough is easing.

To those who enquired - yes, thanks, I managed to get through the bus journeys and the funeral without coughing much, thanks to sucking boiled sweets to lubricate my throat.

The cough is improving very slowly, and is generally a lot better during the day, but still troubles me at night.
My colds always end up with a tickly, catarrhal cough, but this one is taking much longer to shift than normal.

The final bus home this evening was quite cold, so I'm still warming up again. Think I might have a warm shower to speed the process.

Haven't studied all the posts I've missed while away - just skimmed through quickly.
Will have a proper look tomorrow!

Afternoon everyone

Joan, so glad you have posted but so sorry you are not feeling yourself. It must be so very hard being separated from hubby but at least he is close by so you can see him often.

I wonder what happened to your tongue? Did you eat something very hot and burn it or maybe cut eat eating something sharp like a crisp?I dont think there are many things except Bonjela that you can use but some ice cold juice or mouthwash might help.

Well its down.....the tree that is! Couldnt wait for daughter so i started on the top section and worked my way down bit by bit. The lights I have wrapped around a rectangular piece of stiff card. Dad always did this and they stayed untangled.

The floor of course has a few strands of lambetta and artificial needles too, plenty of them so the vacuum cleaner will be earning its keep later.

The room looks so bare now but we get used to it soon enough. Just the window stickers to peel off etc. Daughter will have to go up the big ladder and put the boxes plus tree back in the loft. No our fav job but we manage.

So I messaged SIL last night to see if she could convince my brother to get the boiler serviced. He has had a bad dose of lu all over xmas & new year and has not been in the best of moods!! He says next year, he will get the flu jag and they are going away for xmas :-D :-D

Anyway he is better now and has agreed. So hopefully will get the service very soon. I'm so relieved as didn't want that to be a problem and hold up the sale proceedings.

Weather wise it is windy and wet and not a nice day at all. I need to go out to the recycling bin but not today!

Well better carry on finishing off restoring the house back to normal.

Joan, hope you find something in the freezer for tea and listen if its full up, then think of the money you are saving. Are you allowed to make anything special for hubby and take it in? Some cakes maybe? Also how about a trip to the garden centre with your daughter. Make the most of being able to go out freely just now without hurrying back home for hubby.

I hope he will recover enough to be back home with you soon.

We are always here to listen if you want a good moan about anything and we dont judge :-D

Take care all

Florence in the hebrides

It is good to hear from you Joan, but I am sorry that you are feeling so down.
Emptying the freezer is quite therapeutic. I have two and used most things up when we expecting to move in December. Now, I am restocking it until we get a new buyer and then I will have to run it down again.

I would have that boiler serviced as well Florence, they always want to see that it has been done within the last year.
I have done the bathrooms with only one coughing fit. The only thing to do is a quick dash round with the vacuum cleaner, but OH is in charge if that and will do it in the morning. The house is aways spotless in any case. I can’t abide clutter and there is never any visible dust, so it takes very little time to keep on top of it.
This afternoon I am going to do some more family tree. When the girls were here, I didn’t have time to do it, so I am enjoying getting back into it. As the death cert are now so cheap on line, I have been buying more of them, although I already had them for all of the central people

Good afternoon all.
Do hope Joan and hubby are ok. Worrying that she has not popped in. Hopefully it is because she is spending more time with hubby.
Linda sorry that you are so unwell with the cough, they do drag you down, partly because of the lack of sleep.
Son in law here has had a sore throat for five days, nothing else, no cold, temp or cough and no loss of appetite. He did. Covid test which was negative.
Don’t envy you all that ironing Florence and now a muddle waiting for daughter to come home. You have to just not ‘see’ it.

Hope AG got to Edinburgh ok with no coughing fits on the bus.

It might be a good idea to get the boiler serviced to save waiting around. A straight service should cost around £75.

Damp here but patches of blue sky at the moment. Daughter and SiL seem content to stay in. I have to admit I would prefer a breath of fresh air .

Afternoon Linda and anyone looking in.

Goodness Linda, you could do without a viewing when you are not well! However it could lead to a sale but you will be exhausted. Just do a bit stop 10 mins and carry on with lots of breaks otherwise you will become worse with coughing etc with all the dusting.

I made a start today taking down all the decs, 2 trees and umpteen ornaments all over the house! So top of filing cabinet all back to normal. Dusted computer desk and surrounds, hall bookshelves needed dusting badly!

But daughter just messaged to say, she is not coming back until tomorrow now!!! My coffee table is full of everything as not sure where she put the boxes in her bedroom and Im not digging around in there. So many boxes everywhere so it will all have to stay there until shes back.

Yes a bit worried for Joan as shes not been on, hope you are ok and hubby Joan if you are looking in.

Hope AG made it to Edinburgh as she wasn't well herself and such a long journey with 2 buses.

Im just sitting with a coffee as was getting breathless. Was trying to rush everything and i just cant rush so having a sit down for a bit.

Dad is ok but he sounds quite frail on the phone. Im sending back all the docs to my brother today so one step nearer to selling.

I got through to Br Gas yesterday after waiting 45 mins, got date of last service Sep 2021! I asked him if he could email that info to confirm the date and he said he would have to enquire and would tel me back. Famous last words as no call back and no email.
Im beg to think we should just get the boiler serviced and then we have peace of mind and so do the buyers, just need to convince my brother!!

Well I shall carry on being busy and Linda, take your time.

Shall look in later.

Florence in the hebrides

Good morning, I hope everyone is doing well, my cough is still dreadful
I have just been through the house doing all the dusting in preparation for the house viewing tomorrow. It is crazy that I feel so worn out just doing that. In fact, I still have the lounge to do, but have had to sit down for a rest before I can tackle it.
This afternoon I will clean the bathroom, shower room and downstairs loo, so in the morning I will just need to have a quick tidy up.

We haven’t seen Joan for a few days, so I hope everything is alright with her.