General Chat

FIFTY SHADES OF GREY - By Pam Ayres of course..

The missus bought a Paperback,
down Shepton Mallet way,
I had a look inside her bag;
... T'was "Fifty Shades of Grey".
Well I just left her to it,
And at ten I went to bed.
An hour later she appeared;
The sight filled me with dread...
In her left she held a rope;
And in her right a whip!
She threw them down upon the floor,
And then began to strip.
Well fifty years or so ago;
I might have had a peek;
But Mabel hasn't weathered well;
She's eighty four next week!!
Watching Mabel bump and grind;
Could not have been much grimmer.
And things then went from bad to worse;
She toppled off her Zimmer!
She struggled back upon her feet;
A couple minutes later;
She put her teeth back in and said
I am a dominater !!
Now if you knew our Mabel,
You'd see just why I spluttered,
I'd spent two months in traction
For the last complaint I'd uttered.
She stood there nude and naked
Bent forward just a bit
I went to hold her, sensual like
and stood on her left t**!
Mabel screamed, her teeth shot out;
My god what had I done!?
She moaned and groaned then shouted out:
"Step on the other one"!!
Well readers, I can't tell no more;
About what occurred that day.
Suffice to say my jet black hair,
Turned fifty shades of grey

Wait for the RR - hang on it is Pam Ayres

Very funny Staffs :-D

I'll pass that one on.

It will be great to have Pam Ayres reported :-D :-D

Not seen that poem, Col. Quite brilliant - particularly about treading on the other one :-D :-D Real chuckle this morning.

I love Pam Ayres poems :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D

Brilliant :-D

But it's not by Pam Ayres. :-D

Is it one of yours Rose? ;-) :-D

Black and blue, battered too,
With wanton, wild perversion,
We decided that a night of sin
Was scarce worth such exertion.

Thank Heavens she has binned the book
And peace reigns, like before.
She’s head to toe in winceyette
And back to back, we snore.

lol no Island, but I might suggest it as an aasignment for the writers group? ;-)

I like your ending very much lol :-D :-D

Not my ending I'm afraid Rose :-( I found those addition verses on a site/blog which invited others to add a verse.

I googled to find out the true writer but only found 'writer unknown'.

I do like Pam Ayres style and Victoria Wood.

Like that one Col.

I saw a hilarious book yesterday called fifty sheds of grey.

M

BRILLIANT

:-D :-D :-D :-D

We went to bed
Nothing was said
How I did whine
Cos she stamped on mine :-S

Any chance of joining the writers club. I think I have a flair for poetic competition.

And Island's was better even than mine. :-)

I'm amazed its still here

Perhaps reporter likes the Pam Ayres style. Strange thread has so far passed censor, Col. Thye may be on holiday :-S

Funny!

there is nothing that poem,that deserves reporting..........u lott are paranoid!!!!


Bob