General Chat

gladly some children and grandchildren are still brought up with manners,it runs through familys i think...certainly though mine. manners cost nothing.
my sons age 28 and 23 still kiss and hug their grandfather and older uncles when they meet each other. my children have never raised their voices to myself or my hubby(we do have disagreements like any other family) they respect people.we didnt have much when our four children were young and they didnt have everything(the 80s) but manners they did have.. :-)

Oh don't get me on bus manners Brenda. Sitting with their feet on the seats, sitting one to a double seat and shouting across the bus. Sitting in the 'elderly and disabled' seats with headphones on and head down and not 'seeing' an elderly person struggling down the bus. Just one boys' school in this area teaches manners to its pupils who always allow adults on first, staand up for you etc. Or it may be that they coincidentally all come from homes where they learn manners (It is not a private school)

On a different note...and I agree that children don't have the manners that we were brought up with although I do get thankyou notes from most (not all) my grandchildren....but I have just come home on the bus from the shopping centre on a very hot day here in Oz.
I was loaded up with shopping,went to the bus station,and schoolgirls were sitting on the seats in the shelter,and left me outside in the sun with my bags.Not one stood up to let me sit...unheard of in my day.I know I'm not disabled,but am 76!!
They also ran on to the bus when it arrived and didn't give way to anyone else.Grrrr.

karen
my mum was the same,and no talking.x :-D

Karen Lol!!! :-D

Oh Ann, don't get me started on the 'children running around in restaurants' thing :-( :-0........aaarrrrggggghhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!

Asking to leave the table - it was such a big thing in our house when we were young that my big brother (now age 58) whenever he visits mum, jokingly says at the end of a meal, "please may I get down from the table"...it always raises a huge laugh with his kids!

Suzanne, until I was quite old I had to ask to 'leave the table' after meals. My children never left the table without everyone finishing. I am appalled these days in restaurants when children are allowed to run around not just after a meal but during it.

Karen it was little white boxes with silver lined label in our case and I remember coming home from honeymoon and sitting in my parent's kitchen addressing loads. I bet postage would be prohibitive these days. :-)

Ann - yes I remember the wedding cake through the post....it used to come in a tiny tin or box, something I haven't seen for years. Do people still do that?

Sylvia - thanks for mentioning that - I'm of a mind now to contact the company and enquire if the gift was actually 'processed'. As I paid by credit card I know the money was taken straight away, but I guess that's no guarantee that the couple got the gift.

Karen

Karen

My daughter was absolutely devastated a year after her wedding when she went to a branch of a major department store in the city where she now lives.

She had her Gift Registry with that department store, listed at one of the branches in the city where I live. The Registry remains listed for 1 year after the wedding, and someone had sent a gift from it for their 1st anniversary


The sales assistant emerged from the store room, and said "Would you like this one as well?"


A gift had been sitting there since before their wedding ................ from one of our very oldest (in both senses of the word) friends. And one who was a stickler of thank you notes.

M had never said a word to me ................. which I wish she would have done! She hated Gift Registries, and we had told her that she didn't have to use it .................... and in fact I thought she had bought something else. Daughter had not realised that they had not received anything from M.


Daughter immediately sent a most apologetic note ...... and complained to the company!






sylvia

We always received thank you notes/letters from our nieces and nephew when they were growing up ......... we stopped giving them presents as each turned 21.

We now receive thank yous from the children of those that have them ............... even the 1 year olds have sent "drawings" attached to a letter from Mum!

Our daughter was raised to write her thank yous within a week of Christmas and New Year .............. that's slipped a bit in recent years as she is juggling house, job and toddler.

But we got their thank you letter last week ............ having been thanked by phone and email at Christmas.


We used to send presents to OH's godchildren (and to the 2 siblings of one of them) .................... but stopped when we had not received a thank you note for 2 years on the run.






and this thread reminds me that I have not sent MY thank you note to daughter and family for their birthday present to me 3 weeks ago :-0


But I did thank them at the time, by email and phone!




sylvia

omg super,
you have just taken me back to the seventys,
my mum was just like you,if we talked at the table we were given a slap on the head(really not pc in 2012 ha) and if we ever forgot our manners,we were in for it(from mum)i brought my 4 children up the same way(manners dont cost anything)and my children(2 out of four have a child)they are the same,manners are everything in our family.x :-)

No, it is not old fashioned Karen it is poor parenting. And not too much to ask when you have spent money on them. It should be automatic. time was when people sent gifts but didn't attend the wedding they would be sent a piece of wedding cake in the post. :-)

My nephews are very good at saying thank you, they always have been, as is my goddaughter. Even before they could write properly their mum would get them to draw something and she'd help them write their name underneath as a way of saying thank you. Now they are older they phone me to say thank you and often drop a note too, or text me.

I was very disappointed with a cousin's daughter who got married last October and STILL hasn't acknowledged the gift, sent a wedding photograph - nothing. As I was talking to my cousin last week I thought I'd just let slip that my elderly mum is SO looking forward to receiving a few photos, but was saying doesn't the mail from Australia take an age!!! ;-)
Personally I'm disgusted that someone hasn't thanked us for a wedding gift....in this day and age when there's the choice of FB, e.mail, letter, phone, text etc etc etc it's easier to communicate now than ever it was!
But I suppose I'm considered old fashioned. :-0

Karen

*slap for Eldrick* that was awful :-P

Dont know if courtesy is a thing of the past, but nostalgia is

:-D

I was brought up to write thankyou letters.Every Christmas one of my presents would be a set of Notelets .Boxing day I would be writing mt thankyou notes.My children always sent thankyou letters .They are now in their mid/late twenties and I still make sure they say thankyou lol.Not that I need to .But it is one of my 'things'.I think it is just so rude not to thank someone for a gift.I am a stickler for good manners. :-D :-D

I drummed it into my 3 kids when they were young to always write thankyou letters and now they're adults they do it automatically. Sometimes it was a bit of a battle when they were young, but it's paid off. Just plain good manners in my opinion.

Grandson is encouraged to say thank you, he doesnt really know what for...lolol but daughter always sends thank you cards or telephones family and our friends who send little one money or gifts.

Ours had to eat with their forks not as a shovel, leave their cutlery at 6 o/c on their plates and ask to be excused from the table. Open doors for people older than them, offer seats, say please and thankyou.

Sue x

Hiya Wendy. You OK?