General Chat

what is the speed of dark

what do the owl and the pussycat really think they are upto

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings? How is it possible to have a "civil" war? How is it possible to run out of space? How long is the long arm of the law? How many people does it take to change a searchlight bulb? How many weeks are there in a light year? How much can I get away with and still go to heaven? How much milk is there in the Milky Way?

what is the sound of silence

why can't they make planes with the same material as the blak box

is a zebra really a horse in pyjamas

if ignorance is bliss why aren't a lot more people happy

Why are raisins called raisins if they are only dried grapes? Why not just call them dried grapes? Why are some gay people so unhappy? Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes? Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii? Why are they called "stands" when they're made for sitting? Why are violets blue and not violet? Why are you expected to slow down in a speed zone? Why aren't there ever any guilty bystanders? Why buy shampoo when real poo is still free? Why can't you make another word using all the letters in "anagram"? Why can't we tickle ourselves? Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets? Why did the pot call the kettle black? Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? Why do ballet dancers dance on their toes? Why doesn't the company just hire taller dancers? --Fred Allen Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing? Why do flamingos stand on only one leg? Why do flammable and inflammable mean the same thing? Why do hot dogs come ten to a package and hot dog buns only eight? Why do mattresses have springs, if they aren't made for jumping on? Why do people always remember where they were when someone famous was killed? Do they feel perhaps they'll need an alibi? Why do people go to the unemployment office to find a job? Why do people park in driveways and drive on parkways? --Larry Anderson Why do people tell you when they are speechless? Why do pigs have curly tails? Why do the signs that say "Slow Children" have a picture of a running child? Why do they call it 'chili' if it's hot? Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one? Why do they call it 'getting your dog fixed' if afterwards it doesn't work anymore? Why do they call it life insurance? Why do they call it quicksand when it sucks you down slowly? Why do they call the piece of wood a two-by-four if it's only 1 3/4" x 3 1/2"? Why do they give you a tape with a VCR to tell you how to use it? Why do they make cars go so fast its illegal? Why do they make scented toilet paper? Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM? Why do they report power outages on TV? Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat? Why do tourists go to the top of tall buildings and then put money in telescopes so they can see things on the ground in close-up? Why do we call something sent by car a shipment and something sent by ship a cargo? Why do we call them restrooms when no one goes there to rest? Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways? Why do we have hot water heaters when hot water doesn't need to be heated? Why do we kill people for killing people to show that killing is wrong? Why do we need training bras? What can we teach them? Why do we put shirts in a suitcase, and put suits in a garment bag? Why do we say "a pair of pants" when there is only one article of clothing involved? Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack? Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game," when we are already there? Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them? Why do wise guy and wise man mean entirely different things? Why do you feet smell and your nose runs? Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive? Why do you need an appointment to see a psychic? Why does a dishtowel get wet when it dries? Why does a grapefruit look nothing like a grape? Why does Donald Duck wear a towel when he comes out of the shower, when he doesn't usually wear any pants? Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs! Why does it take 15 minutes to cook minute rice? Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin? Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? Why doesn't the fattest man in the world become a hockey goalie? Why don't they call mustaches "mouthbrows?" Why don't they just make food stamps edible? Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? Why get even, when you can get odd? Why is "abbreviated" such a long word? Why is a boxing ring square? Why is a carrot more orange than an orange? --Amboy Dukes Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist? Why is a women's prison called a penal colony? Why is brassiere singular and panties plural? Why is clear considered a color? Why is it called a "building" when it is already built? Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips? Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them? Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin? Why is it that bullets ricochet off of Superman's chest, but he ducks when the gun is thrown at him? Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why is it that famous people are always born on holidays? Why is it that night falls but day breaks? Why is it that only adults have difficulty with childproof bottles? Why is it that rain drops but snow falls? Why is it that to stop Windows 95, you have to click on "Start"? Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio? Why is it you must wait until night to call it a day? Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemonsWhy is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand? --Steven Wright Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Why is the word dictionary in the dictionary? Why is your index finger the same size as your nostrils? Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds? Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet? --Lily Tomlin Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? Why was Evelyn Wood in such a hurry? You can't have everything. Where would you put it? You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes? Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?

if we live in a country of free speech why do we get pelephone bills

hey paul are you in sad mode tonight

where is the blue yonder? is the moon really made of cheese? why do children always do the opposite of what you tell them?

Why can't you buy mouse flavoured cat food Why is the third had on a watch called the second hand

who decided when the clocks go back/forword? who decided which way the hand's on a clock go round? who decided when it would be night & when it would be day? why does egg burn the bottem of the saucepan why do we burn toast & eat it? why do bake beans make you blow off? why is genes so addictive? are the lights in middle of the road really cat's eyes? if car's get stuck in traffic jam's why dont they stick to road? who was the 1st person to pick a potatoe & say yum this nice? how we know fruit/veg is good for us? how come im coming up with all these dumb question's? who did the 1st ever family tree? did we really come from monkey's? how do i stop asking silly question's?

why does toast alway's land buttered side down