General Chat
Welcome to the Genes Reunited community boards!
- The Genes Reunited community is made up of millions of people with similar interests. Discover your family history and make life long friends along the way.
- You will find a close knit but welcoming group of keen genealogists all prepared to offer advice and help to new members.
- And it's not all serious business. The boards are often a place to relax and be entertained by all kinds of subjects.
- The Genes community will go out of their way to help you, so don’t be shy about asking for help.
Quick Search
Single word search
Icons
- New posts
- No new posts
- Thread closed
- Stickied, new posts
- Stickied, no new posts
Tell me a Joke
| Profile | Posted by | Options | Post Date |
|---|---|---|---|
|
Unknown | Report | 8 Jun 2005 11:04 |
|
what do you call a chav in a suit? the accused. |
|||
|
Joy | Report | 8 Jun 2005 11:02 |
|
Knock knock. Who's there? Hello. Hello who? Hello (how low) can you go? |
|||
|
Unknown | Report | 8 Jun 2005 11:02 |
|
lol !! love it and the webbed feet one... |
|||
|
Unknown | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:57 |
|
After a long night of passion, the young guy rolled over, pulled out a cigarette from his jeans and searched for his lighter. Unable to find it, he asked the girl if she had one at hand. 'There might be some matches in the top drawer,' she replied. He opened the drawer of the bedside table and found a box of matches sitting neatly on top of a framed picture of another man. Naturally, the guy began to worry. 'Is this your husband?' he inquired nervously. 'No, silly,' she replied, snuggling up to him. 'Your boyfriend then?' he asked. 'No, not at all,' she said, nibbling away at his ear. 'Well, who is he then?' demanded the bewildered guy. Calmly, Tony replied, 'That's me before the operation.' |
|||
|
Joy | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:53 |
|
Knock knock. Who's there? Bat. Bat who? Bat you can't wait to read more knock knock jokes! |
|||
|
Unknown | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:52 |
|
An animal husbandry expert crossed a hen with a banjo and got a chicken that plucks itself. A sports enthusiast crossed a tin of baked beans with two cricket bats and got wind in the willows The Government has revealed its plans for small shopkeepers - lower counters. The Chancellor, when asked how he proposes to shorten queues at Benefits Offices, said he intends asking claimants to stand closer together. An embarrassing incident has occurred at Madame Tussaud's. After the Deputy Prime Minister had unveiled the new waxwork model of himself, his chauffeur mistakenly drove the model back to the House of Commons. Luckily, it had only attended three Cabinet meetings before the mistake was discovered. |
|||
|
Joy | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:48 |
|
Who are some of the werewolves cousins? Answer: The whatwolves and the whenwolves. |
|||
|
Joy | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:46 |
|
What do you say to a ghost with three heads? Answer: Hello, hello, hello. |
|||
|
Joy | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:36 |
|
A doctor says to his patient, 'I have bad news and worse news'. 'Oh dear, what's the bad news?' asks the patient. The doctor replies, 'You only have 24 hours to live'. 'That's terrible', said the patient. 'How can the news possibly be worse?' The doctor replies, 'I've been trying to contact you since yesterday'. |
|||
|
Joy | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:34 |
|
A turtle was walking down an alley in New York when he was mugged by a gang of snails. A police detective came to investigate and asked the turtle if he could explain what happened. The turtle looked at the detective with a confused look on his face and replied 'I don't know, it all happened so fast.' |
|||
|
~Little Ray of Sunshine~ | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:33 |
|
LOL Joy :-) c x |
|||
|
Joy | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:31 |
|
Why do ducks have webbed feet? To stamp out fires. Why do elephants have flat feet? To stamp out burning ducks. |
|||
|
Slinky | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:23 |
|
or... you take twice as long to look half as good!! >>> Have nudged another of my threads up for you BW...Anne :))) |
|||
|
Unknown | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:22 |
|
you know you are overweight when your passport photo takes up 2 pages! |
|||
|
Unknown | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:21 |
|
Keep them coming Anne, lol. |
|||
|
Slinky | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:21 |
|
or.... At the breakfast table, you hear 'snap, crackle and pop', but you're not eating any cereal!! |
|||
|
Slinky | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:18 |
|
You know you're getting old when you and your teeth don't sleep together!! Anne :) |
|||
|
Unknown | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:17 |
|
I'll second that |
|||
|
Unknown | Report | 8 Jun 2005 10:16 |
|
I don't care how corny - I need a laugh |
|||