General Chat

Hi Sylvia, For reasons didnt get to watch it,,,,,,,,what was your thought---Genetic or not.? Kay,

I watched most of it-missed the beginning-very upsetting-they seemed very lost people-they desperately needed help-the guy with the cuts on his wrist-my god. catherine xx

Hi Kay. Personally I don't think it's genetic. From my experience of living with - now recovering - alcoholic, I think a lot of the addictive state comes from childhood trauma, and a big factor is - loss. My partner had an alcoholic father who used to beat his mother. He used to try to get in between them when his dad was hitting mum. He was also sexually abused by an uncle and taunted by his dad about his dyslexia (also having an intelligent younger sister). Alcohol and other substance abuse is used by people with low self-esteem, for whatever reason, to help blank out, give them a false sense of pride and to ease the pain of loss - a coping strategy. Unfortunately it so very often turns into the addictive state and a way of llife, so very hard to change. But - it can be done. Sylvxx

Hi Sylvia, I just wondered after the thread about it, Yes intrestingly I have always thought this,,more victims with a past become alcohol dependent. kay,

Yes so true Kay. Sylvx

very true sylvia think alot of it comes from child-hood. catherine xx

But it cannot ALL stem from childhood, can it? Many people had equally as bad, if not worse, childhoods than this and yet they do not become alcoholics. I think there must be a genetic disposition to have an addictive nature, if that makes sense, and then it is just the luck of the draw what you choose as your addiction, be it drink, drugs, gambling etc. My friend that I spoke of earlier, had an idyllic childhood, she was an adored princess, late and unexpected girl in a family of boys. Mty late grandfather was an alcoholic, although that word was never used. He could not function without drink and died in his 40s. OC

Yes that's true. At the end of the day it's down to a person's choice as to how they deal with their problems. All about choices.....

I watched it,I thought it was tragic,so very sad. It was enough to put you off even having the occasional drink.

Let's hope it struck a chord in people's hearts Roxanne.

Hi Sylv, I think every Child over 12 should have been made to watch that . Im sure If they could see the damage alcohol can do it would deter them. Roxanne x

seeing those yellow eyes made me feel ill

Couldn't agree more Roxanne. Wonder if it could be put on the curriculum in schools .... it's the sort of thing the government should be doing Just a thought.... Sylvx

Agreed,sylv!! They really should show that film in schools, I though they man that did the filming did it very well,It was very profound. I was watching the first part of it sat with a glass of wine,I actually tipped it down the sink it made me feel so sick.

Yes the maker of the film went very deep and was very understanding. Poor Vanda looked like a frail old lady when she got up from the settee and I believe she was only 42/43...?

43, I believe Sylv. The sad part was that she had obviously been a very attractive woman before her alcohol problem started, very sad. I have to say,I honestly cant understand it,but i surpose its like anything unless you have suffered from it or have known someone personally, you cant.

I watched the programme with great sadness and my thoughts are, it is such a waste of life. The young girl who died and had a young son how awful for him to now grow up without his mother. The chap who had given drink up for 10 years but the damage had already been done, what dignity his wife showed. I was shocked how old Vanda looked as she is the same age as me. The young lad just seems to be in a vicious circle. The common factor seems to be that they are unable to cope with life, they have had some sort of trauma that has led them to drink the way they do. I felt very sad for them and you just know that the future is bleak for the ones still alive. A very moving programme.

Very very sad. I felt sorry for the son of Toni the girl who died. Very hard to believe alcohol can do such terrible destruction to ones body Must be awful to watch a loved one die like that.xx

Well Roxanne, I've learnt an awful lot about addiction from people who suffer from it. You know the old expressiion 'monkey on my shoulder'... well someone I know used to describe his addiction as having another person with him - his addict - whispering in his ear, 'go on, one more won't do any harm...' I sent Lisa Fletcher, on the boards here, something he had written - 'Letter to my Addict' - something he wrote while in rehab. Sylvx

Just watched the final half an hour. I can understand people drinking to help them forget the past but I didnt understand Mark at all. He drank a big glass of wine in one go then immediately threw up into a bucket..... Sorry but dont see that as an addiction to alcohol. Surely you would be addicted to the effects but if he throws it straight back up again he wont be getting any effect.