General Chat

"Would you make me a winner,
And accept my invitation to dinner?"

his heart beat faster
and then he asked her

His colour drained, he was wan,
Especially when she whispered, "You're my man"

Hellooo, she whispered down the phone, he fainted on the spot
He was breathing very hard and feeling very hot

She was a mover and shaker
he wondered if he could still take her
To the Pub where once he woo'd her
Until her mother found them and shoo'ed her
Through the door and far away.
He was very sad that day

with his finger he dialled a number
she was a girl who did the rumba

Now she was gone, and he was alone
He found his little black book and went towards the 'phone

Very good Bob or should I call you Tim ?....


"You are as wide as you are tall," the anger rose within her
I'm going back to live with mum until you get much thinner

Timbuctoo.........

instead of a stagnight we a'hunting went
met three ladies (of the night) in a plastic tent

now they was three and we was two.........
so I bucked one and Timbucked two

Maybe the problem lies with you, she said with a faint smile
For you are only half the man that walked me down the aisle

The night we met , you wore a dress
and said you'd been on jeremy Kyle

(sorry edited co the last bit was rubbish)

Whoops where do I go from here???...

Maybe the problem lies with you, she said with a faint smile
For you are only half the man that walked me down the aisle

"Wotchoo goin on about?" The husband did reply
"I didn't have a stag night, so that's a big fat lie"

So it wasn't you after all
the wife said with a sigh
This is such a sorry state where no one wins
your Best man loses , he's now expecting twins

Nice one PH
:-D

Oops........we posted at the same time Neubie.

"Wotchoo goin on about?" The husband did reply
"I didn't have a stag night, so that's a big fat lie"
:-D

Are you getting fatter? A man said to his wife
I'm sure you were much thinner when you came into my life
Now you are quite squashy and I find it quite a squeeze
To get my arms around you and fit you on my knees


My figure has remained the same
Now shut it you daft punk
You were 2 foot taller and a lot of things have shrunk. ;-)

But darling, do you not remember? she said with a grin
On your stag night, making holes in balloons with a pin?

Are you getting fatter? A man said to his wife
I'm sure you were much thinner when you came into my life
Now you are quite squashy and I find it quite a squeeze
To get my arms around you and fit you on my knees