General Chat

Awww I was a newbie last summer and I didn't find any of you cliquey, very helpful yes, but not cliquey. You just seem to know each other from posting on here and i can't see anything wrong with that! :-)

:-D :-D :-D :-D



I've been called quackers before :-D

This threads not "Cliquey" Just "Clucky" is,nt it Me Ducks? or should that be Quacky? :-D :-D :-D

Thanks Sylvia, it's going to need a miracle I think.

Hi Margaret

I looked, but couldn't see anything to help


s

Sylvia, hope you can help with that thread. Desperate now.

Problems with GR are not problems with newbies, it's a shame to ignore them just cos GR has strange ideas. I will carry on helping where I can.

Hi Julia, Nope not down in Derby but North of County, though I did lecture for 10 years at Derby Uni and had a flat there for those 10 years in Alestree.

Oh, and folks, I am going to be a first-time granny in June!!!

Love

Margaret

Ann


that is why I mentioned the society we joined .........

................ it was a national professional group, so we were meeting botanists from across the Canada, and a few foreigners as well :-D

Some of the foreigners (as well as the Canadians) were real characters

...... anyone remember David Bellamy, the British TV botanist???

We closed the bar with him most nights at one meeting, where he was the invited major speaker :-D:-D

I suppose we formed a clique with him that time :-D ........... he seemed to feel he had more in common with OH (and thus myself) than with the others there.


At the first annual meeting we went to, most people seemed to know each other .... there were 6 or so newbies, like us ......... so it was natural to sit together.


I'm not saying people weren't friendly ........ but this was often the only time in the year when they did meet up, or their spouses met up with other spouses ......... so they were all busy catching up on the last year's happenings.

I went on a couple of the spouse trips that time, one was to Peggy's Cove (the meeting was in Nova Scotia) ............ and really felt on the outer edge. Yet, individually, those other women (and one man!!) were very friendly ......... it was when 2 or more got together that I felt isolated as they talked about things i knew nothing about.


You can guess what happened .................. over the next few years those 6 or 7 newbies became the same, wanting to catch up with each other every year.


But it was a shock to me when someone said about 20 years later ...... I feel as though you're all a clique, you're all always together :-0


OH and I made definite efforts every year to greet and sit with newbies ...... who most often were graduate students or young scientists in their first job ................. and were much more likely to sit a lunch with some of them rather than our friends.

We'd certainly never thought of ourselves as being in a clique


.............. and that is what made me think along the lines of what I put in the OP


Hi Julia ........ Thank you. It's lunch time here now!



sylvia
xxx

Quite right Ann, the water is warm, come on in it's lovely.

I think we all feel a bit strange when we go into something that is outside our 'comfort zone' It is like starting a new job. Everyone knows each other, and you feel like an outsiders.

All it takes is one person to introduce you around, and you find that you can talk to them all.

It took me a good 6 months before I ventured onto the Boards. Everyone seemed to 'know' each other. I did try to join in a couple of threads, and was frozen out, so retreated back into my shell for a week or so.

Nevertheless, I tried again, and now I drive people up the wall by my endless drivel. lol

[Rambling again, cos I am tired]. :-D

Good thread Sylvia. I think people refer to a clique when they are new and they have opened a thread which is moving fast and they can tell everyone is having fun and all seem to know each other. They feel intimidated (without reason of course but the clique is perceived). Then, maybe a month or so down the line they realise that each thread is just full of ordinary (I say that tongue in cheek :-D :-D) people who are having a laugh and they find, when they dip a toe in the water that they are welcomed.

I once ventured to a women's Institute meeting in the village I now live, I only went one evening because everyone had their own friends and they formed into groups chatting. I was welcomed by a couple of people but I am not very outgoing (honestly!) and couldn't face going back on my own again. so my perception was that it was 'cliquey'. But I am sure it wasn't really. So it can happen to any of us.

And here,s me thinking it was for Slicing off Horses Heads. :-D :-D :-D

Ooo'er Merlin, you dun 'arf make me larf. Why, this whalebone in me stays is fer' diggin' in me ribs. LOLOL


Julia in Derbyshire

Come off it Julia, we all know You,re the "Mafia Boss of Bosses" :-D Running the Knitting and Pickling Rackets., :-D :-D ;-)

Good Morning MadMeg
There are so few of us on here from Derbyshire, we could hardly be described as a clique. In fact, there are so few of us, we hardly form a gang. I have only found a handful of us. I am near the borders with that county, whose name we hardly mention in these parts. ( I think a man called Brian Clough had a little do do with it) LOLOL
Where abouts are you.

Take Care

Julia in Derbyshire


PS. Nighty night Sylvia, sleep tight. LOL

Hi Madmeg!

nice to see you :-D

Hope you are well.

Happy Birthday for the 22nd ....... I'll be there in spirit ;-)


as to why we seem to be not posting ......... many of us got thoroughly disillusioned with the problems on GR, which the powers that be seem unable to solve.

That is why many have left. Some of us are still hanging in, hoping that things will get better .............. but even I am losing hope


I'll go look at your thread now,


sylvia

I think that some people like to belong to cliques. They are often the least cliquey people, but get some comfort from being a member. Then there are others who feel that a clique already exists that they can't break into, so feel rejected.

I think, about two years ago, or maybe less, there was a group of people on here, many of whom have commented on this thread, who might have been seen as a clique, but actually were not a clique, but just a group of researchers all as good as one another, used to one another, able to throw obscure connections between families off one another, and come to some great conclusions for the benefit of posters having dificulties. The flavour of GR seems to have changed recently. A lot of you people are nowhere near as active as you used to be, and I think that is a shame. Why have you all given up?

And where is Janey?

Some of you I know are in personal contact with her.

I don't like to say that she was the best, but she was the best.

I have a knotty problem I want help with.

Here's the thread.

http://www.genesreunited.co.uk/boards.page/board/ancestors/thread/1284479

Can some of you cliquey people help please? I notice the names, and recognise them as good people. I don't really care if you are in a clique or not, I just want some clever people to help.

And happy New Year to you all. Hope 2012 is good for you. I am 60 next week. Anyone and everyone is invited to my birthday party on Sunday 22nd. Derbyshire, England, 3-6 p.m. drinks and nibbles.

EDIT must invite Derbyshire Derek. Don't think he is in any clique!

Love

Margaret

:-D :-D :-D :-D :-D


thank you!

Oh dear Sylvia, do you think this is a new clique ;-)

Good thread Sylvia!

Thank you everyone!


The thread was a result of thoughts late at night :-D


and I do like that no-one has got angry or snarkey to anyone else expressing different views :-D



sylvia
xx

Quite right Dizzi.

Cor, that means that there must be thousands of potential friends out there.

By the by, how are you?

:-)

And put your teeth in a glass of water to chat with later. :-D :-D <3 ;-).pmsl.xx